Tuesday, October 29, 2019

Make a structuralist analysis of a film or films of your choice. As Essay

Make a structuralist analysis of a film or films of your choice. As part of your analysis discuss the type of structuralist analysis you are using - Essay Example For that reason, this essay will focus on the work of Akira Kurosawa. Anyone who has been to the movies might have noticed that as you leave, there is a lot of animation in the people as they talk about the movie they saw. Often times, as people leave a movie, they seem quite happy. We can attribute this happiness to having been entertained, but it probably goes beyond just entertainment. Especially in the first few moments following the viewing of a movie, people seem to be still involved in the film in a very noticeable way. Then, perhaps a little after the feelings have somewhat subsided and they’re moving around again in their own lives. For 90 minutes or more prior they had suspended their disbelief and become a part of the film they were watching.1 For the period of the film and for perhaps a brief time following it, the viewer has had an experience of, â€Å". . . self-development, identification, catharsis and insight.†2 The film experience allows the viewer to experience the challenge of action, to be a hero or heroine, to feel that first love again, to fulfill dreams and ambitions. If we are to consider the interaction of the viewer in the film, as the viewer relates to the characters, as the viewer fulfills fantasy, dreams and daydreams; the term â€Å"entertainment† then takes on an enlarged meaning. In considering the film watching experience, similarities between that experience and the experience of a dream can be found. For instance, the individual sense of seeing the picture on the screen from afar, and the sense of fulfillment that comes from having viewed action or heroism, for instance, is not so different than dreams that evolve to be worked out on the stage of the mind’s subconscious and as viewed by the mind’s eye. The ultimate personal benefit of film and dreaming are therefore very similar

Sunday, October 27, 2019

The Business Model Of The BBC

The Business Model Of The BBC The business model of the BBC is quite complex as it is funded by the government through TV licence fees, however, it is expected to be many things:  [3]  private and public, profit and non-profit making, a respected and responsible national institution as well as a nimble entrepreneurial entity. The BBC could be defined as an  [4]  intersect organization which demonstrates its conflicting objectives. The BBCs mission is to  [5]  enrich peoples lives with programmes and services that entertain, inform and educate through its various forms of media communication, that is to say, its purpose is to provide a value for money service to the public. It provides value for money through a variety of shows, for example, regarding ethnic minorities which other channels would not consider and also there are a wide range of channels which are dedicated to specific age groups such as CBeebies for kids and BBC Four focuses on documentaries whilst there are different radio stations for various genres of music thus conveying the diversity of the BBC appealing to all kinds of people including minorities through radio, television and internet. This value is also extended through the use of BBC iPlayer which enables viewers to catch up on watch again episodes such as Top Gear. The BBC prides itself on delivering innovative and informative programmes through the revolutionary technology of internet, digital and satellite communications. The BBC claim their vision is to be  [6]  the most creative organisation in the world and their goal is clear which is to be a global icon. They also wish to represent an independent view point on issues such as politics and be a proud representation of Britain. Their main objective is not to earn significant profit but to be globally recognized as a top quality producer of innovative programmes and services via a wide range of mediums and offer the best news coverage in the world. The BBC provides a wide range of shows from entertainment to sports coverage to educational programmes. It is also committed to earning profit through the sale of educational books and TV shows whilst also doing charity work. In addition, the cooperation is dedicated to research and development which has lead to a strong presence on the internet and BBC radio and television are available in over  [7]  99.4% of UK homes. It is mainly based in London, however, through the leadership of  [8]  Mark Thompson he has decided to diversify and move employees to Manchester to change the stereotype of their image as a London cooperation. I think that the present situation is viable; however, a few changes could be made which I will mention later. I believe that the current situation is tenable as the BBC is universally renowned for its productions which will generate cash flow though the sale of programmes and the sheer number of people who watch their news coverage which covers sport to politics. The BBC has done very well as it moulds itself to different areas and markets of the world to appeal to certain people through e.g. BBC world or releasing a BBC channel in Arabic. The cooperation has also divulged itself into the technology side making all its information and programmes easily and readily accessible which will hopefully meet the demands of the people in the ever evolving technology based world we live in. The BBC have the upper hand over BSkyB in the sense that their brand image is internationally recognized and their unique selling point is the originality of its programmes which must carry on as they enri ch peoples lives. Also the plan to go digital must stay on course as when this is complete they will be able to compete with BSkyB as the BBCs services do not need a satellite box and dish. Due to the current situation, the BBC must make slight changes to their business model because of the emergence of BSKYB which has dominated the UK market recently. They are now competing with hundreds of channels thus resulting in less guaranteed viewers because the BBC has  [9]  traditionally taken programmes from internal or external sources and fitted them into their schedule via their two channels to meet the needs of the audience therefore they could make more specific channels like BBC education. Firstly they need to do this because it will be able to compete against the plethora of new channels but also to convince people that satellite television is not necessary as the BBC has it all. However the BBCs income is fixed as the licence fee is set by the government so as its other main competitors are using this profit to expand and increase their range of services whilst the BBC is falling behind therefore the BBC must find new ways of generating more of a cash flow to keep up with its competitors possibly through online advertising. In addition, thanks to the growth of broadband one is now able to stream TV through their computer and access content easily which provides a further threat to the BBC but to which they have taken to their advantage whereby they have introduced BBC iPlayer which has attracted 41 million requests in December 2008 alone. With regard to the future, the BBC cannot carry on being all things to  [10]  everyone this is not viable as they are mainly government funded hence they cannot expected to meet the needs of everyone. I think this does not allow it to focus as there is no clarity because you cannot be all things to all people it is virtually impossible and it is not viable at all due to the increasingly competitive market but needs to be careful as its budget is very limited. The BBC needs to be efficient and the job cuts might be justified as they need to ensure their financial stability and future ambitions. Michael Porter highlights three generic positions which can be implemented to create a competitive and profitable advantage: Cost leadership, focus and differentiation. Cost leadership strategy underlines the fact that the company must become the lowest cost producer but produce a given level of quality which the consumers are happy with. This strategy is illustrated via  [11]  Toyota which supplies quality cars which are low in cost but have marketing skills to use a premium pricing policy. A differentiation generic strategy offers a product or service to consumers which are unique whereby they believe it is better than their rivals. This can be done through creative programmes, strong sales team and developing brand strength. The focus strategy is a middle ground line taken whereby the organization cannot take on either strategy therefore they focus on a narrow and elite market. This will create a relationship in the long term with specific consumers and the organization must provide whenever needed. Out of these three strategies the BBC does have a bit of each strategy; nonetheless, I believe that the main strategy utilized by the company is differentiation with a hint of cost leadership. The main strategy is differentiation because the BBCs brand image is internationally recognized and is well known for its quality programmes. The hint of cost leadership is that they have attempted to minimise cost as much as possible through mainly redundancies and also through the TV licence only costing  £142.50 per year, although an increase, is relatively cheap in comparison with rivals. Through the culmination of these strategies this would provide customers real value for money as well as discouraging potential entrants. 12Porter claims that the main ingredient needed is clarity in combination with one of these strategies. He goes on to say that the companies that do not follow this model do not necessarily fail, however, they fail to maximise and optimise their resources hence this does not put them in a comfortable situation which could have been avoided. Due to the fact that everyone must have a TV licence for their television sets the licence the BBC must provide good value for money and cater to peoples needs. Through differentiation strategy the company is able to grab a hold of the market through customer loyalty and if the quality is to the consumers satisfaction will discourage potential entrants. I believe this is the generic strategy as the BBCs main income comes from TV licence fees so it needs to be unique and this strategy can be only maintained if the BBC carries on offering creative and innovative programmes. There are five industry forces in a competitive market according to Michael Porter: Barriers to entry, Buyer power, Supplier power, Threat of substitutes and Rivalry. With regard to the five industry forces mentioned, the entry barriers of differentiation strategy gives the opportunity to deter potential entrants through customer loyalty in the hope that you gain some kind of monopoly in the market. Buyer power is a strength of differentiation because large buyers have less power to negotiate due to fewer alternatives. The cooperation will also find it easier to pass on supplier costs to consumers as they are willing to pay that bit extra. The company will be well protected from the threat of substitutes due to the consumers attachment of the differentiated company. The brand loyalty will keep consumers from rivals and put the company in a strong position. Overall the strong points of differentiation strategy are that it ensures customer loyalty with guaranteed quality which will discourage and one can pass on costs to the consumer because of their affiliation to the service. From the companys point of view of the company it guarantees consumers and secures stability in the long term. Leadership plays a key role in providing the vision and direction that structures the way in which the company will work in terms of strategy.  [13]  Leaders are expected to deliver and achieve what they set out to do and they also are expected to establish standards and motivate the employees to achieve maximum potential whilst also being totally committed. A leader must act in the interests of everyone and achieve quality communication between all staff. Taking this into account I will now analyse the leadership of the BBC with regard to Mark Thompson. The director-general, Mark Thompson, has decided to pull out of the so called ratings war but as the BBC is a public service broadcaster this should not be its priority. I see this as a strength as it will allow the BBC to make original and refreshing programmes that will offer a range to viewers. As the BBCs revenue comes through the governments implementation of the TV licence this again gives the BBC an advantage because it provides it with assured revenue and stability which guarantees job security for the staff and also ensures that BBCs priority are the viewers and not to gain profit. Another positive is that the government does not intervene in affairs of the BBC which permits the BBC to work in its own way and be unconstrained. Thanks to the leadership of Mark Thompson the BBC is to become more diluted through the  £200 million investment in the new BBC base in Salford Quays which will diversify and dilute its London influence in the hope that it will be seen as more Britis h. The BBCs commitment to technological advancement is a major strength as the demand is growing and it has certainly provided through the launch of BBC iPlayer and the completion of the switchover to digital throughout the whole country. The technology will also enable the need for fewer job requirements and possibly render some staff to leave which will ease the financial situation. The Director-General has also highlighted the need to have no imitation programmes and the return to in depth current affairs coverage which will please viewers as they want something unique. The BBC must also ensure it keeps its coverage of certain sports which attract a wide range of viewers and are extremely popular such as Wimbledon tennis championship, Formula 1 coverage and Match of the Day. Mark Thompson has been a great leader to the BBC as he always sent out emails to staff to underline his aims and objectives which give employees a sense of unity demonstrating his clarity of objectives and communication. When the salaries of executives at the BBC were revealed, Thompson immediately proposed the pay of the top 20 executives to be frozen for the next three years including his salary but also the suspension of bonuses for managers. He has done extremely well when the BBC has received so much abuse and attempted to resolve the issue without kicking up a fuss and enforcing absol ute standards: the sign of a leader. Mr Thompson is courageous and is not afraid to do what others might not, he recognized that redundancies were needed and so that is what he did this could be perceived as ruthless or rather, putting the companys interests at heart. The decision to dilute and diversify from London is in my opinion a weakness of leadership of the BBC as London has always served as an excellent hub to the company and is at the centre of everything. In a way Mr Thompson has contradicted himself because he claims that he wants to dilute the London influence by relocating staff to ensure there is evenness (2004) but a year later he decided that substantial job losses (6,000) were in order from different regional offices then why did he not make redundant those 1,800 going to Manchester. In reality Mark Thompson is a great journalist, however, one cannot expect him to be a great leader as well and this has been exposed during his time through various incidents, Brand-Ross incident and reporting of the war in Iraq, which have put the BBC under some serious pressure and abuse from the media. In 2007, the BBC were faced with losses and shortfalls of up to  £2 billion thus announcing the speeding up of the relocation of staff to Manches ter, nevertheless, I cannot understand how this ploy is supposed to help the situation and further the announcement of up to 3,000 redundancies is clearly not going to help the situation. I think that this is bad decision making and shows the desperation and weakness of the leadership of the company. As well Mark Thompson has shown a lack of control with the regard to the pay of executives at the BBC, it is  [14]  claimed that top 47 paid executives salaries range from  £190,000 to more than  £600,000 which is astonishing even though the BBC has had to lay off more than 2,000 staff. This shows real weakness on behalf of Mark Thompson including the running and decision making in the cooperation as well. I think Mark Thompson is a very direct leader and always has clear objectives or solutions. His main strengths are arguably communication, although, not in person and acting in the interests of the company exhibited by the restructuring of pay and focus on technology. In my opinion, his main weaknesses are his lack of experience and enthusiasm which sometimes leads to uncertainty and does not boost morale of staff. On the basis of what I am told, the priorities of the leadership should be to resolve the job redundancy levels before strikes might severely cripple the company. As the BBC have decided to divulge more into technology they must ensure that it is fully functioning with no problems due to the fact that they have a history with these sort of issues: electronic accounting system which deletes invoices. Probably the most important priority is to complete the move to Manchester to convey that they are serious and committed to diluting the London influence. I believe that there are two main priorities which are key to resolving the BBCs future and ensuring its stability. There needs to be a restructuring of the wage bill at the top of the company the salaries that have been quoted regarding executives and performers are excessive due to the BBC being a public service broadcaster. Through restructuring the wages this will free up some funds and put the interests of the company at heart. Also more attention is needed towards staff as they are at the hub of what the company does and by creating a sense of unity will hopefully move towards optimum performance because without the staffs capabilities and willingness nothing can be achieved. The relocation to Manchester must be completed as soon as possible because this will demonstrate the devotion and the ability to achieve their objectives. In addition, the BBC must stick to its aim to go digital which will help with their increase in the use of technology and provide consumers with a wide variety of ways to keep up with programmes and watch them in the highest quality possible. The BBC has had to deal with an array of issues over its time and there are situations which could have been handled differently. The slowness of the relocation to Manchester is a problem because firstly it shows that the BBC are not serious about diluting their London influence and also if the staff are not onboard then the move will not reap its expected rewards. In addition, the magnitude of redundancies that are occurring at the company does not reflect well on the situation and creates an unpleasant vibe with staff possibly leading to strikes causing turmoil. When the BBC releases technology it must be fully functional because people lose confidence and trust. If there are any issues that give consumers an excuse to purchase an alternative and then the cooperation will acquire a bad reputation. The other issue is the pay and behaviour of executives and presenters. The executives pay is outrageous and upsets the public as their licence fee money is being wasted on the salaries of overpaid executives further damaging the BBCs image. It is clear that one of the main problems that could have been tackled in a different way is that of the relocation to Manchester. There is no problem with the idea itself, however, there seems to be a lack of drive and determination to progress by Mark Thompson and the move only seems to lead to further redundancies. In summer 2008, it seemed as if the BBC were not serious about relocating which gives us a reflection of the ambition of Thompson to complete this move of certain departments. I believe the relocation should have been completed by now and this is a sign of weakness for the BBC because they have been funded by  [15]  millions of public and private money so there should be no excuses. Also the fact that they are now offering  [16]  generous relocating packages to London staff is absurd because they are employees of the company hence they should either agree to it or not. On the face of it, it seems a pretty desperate move by the BBC as employees should be excited about moving into a modern base and that is the way I believe the BBC should have tackled it in order to convince employees to move through the excitement factor of being a part of something special. Culminated with all this there are lay-offs occurring in order to save money and then we see them offering these charitable packages. Also I believe there is a contradiction because the majority of these redundancies are to come from different regional offices so the idea to become more British by relocating to Manchester will not work as other offices will have fewer employees. If they want the BBC to become more British then they should employ people from other regions rather than relocating London based staff but the BBC defend this  [17]  position claiming they need their experience and ironically some of them will not even move. I believe that the redundancy issue should have been tackled by more London based staff facing the sack. In my opinion, the BBC are taking the relocation in the right direction in the sense that this move needs to be completed as soon as possible and they need their experienced London staff to ease the transition. It is now paramount to complete this move and if the relocation package speeds things up then it is a positive move. The desired outcome would be that everything is up and running by 2011 because it has taken too long. Despite the BBCs previous track record regarding technology which has caused them numerous problems the release of BBC iPlayer sparked several issues and frustrated viewers all over the country.  [18]  100,000 people registered for the iPlayer during its first weekend of release which demonstrates the popularity of BBCs media and this problem could have easily been remedied through applying various tests and ensuring a pretty much flawless version. I believe if it had been fully functional when released the BBC would have gained applause and restored the confidence of the nation in them. The desired outcome of this case is very simple which is to have a fully functioning media player which provides viewers with what they want and the ability to carry out any function that was promised. The BBC has become shrouded lately in controversy and has been accused of bias which affects their global iconic image and their supposed independent view point on issues. Taking the Brand and Ross incident, this has damaged the BBCs integrity and generated massive media attention once again denting their image. This issue should have never arisen in the first place if the BBC had been more stringent and set out the rules with these two presenters the idea would have never popped into their heads as it clearly was unprofessional and uncalled for. It was a very daft and unnecessary incident which has smeared BBC radio twos reputation. The BBC would hope now that this sets a precedent and is now a warning to those others to not generate such extreme media pressure needlessly. Last of all, the BBC must now tackle the issue to do with salaries of executives and presenters which it has dealt with to a certain extent. The issue initially begun because Mark Thompson himself is earning an incredible amount,  [19]  Ã‚ £647,000 basic salary, which sets the standard that other top executives can as well. The BBCs way of tackling this issue was to publish the salaries to show their cautiousness with licence payers money because once the MPs expenses came to the light they were bombarded with complaints. This could have been tackled by completely restructuring the pay of the whole company which is unlikely to occur or simply not revealing the salaries. The second option is the easiest and seems sensible because the BBC should have known that when they released these figures it would cause mass uproar as they are a public service broadcaster. Taking into account everything, the best but not easiest solution is to restructure the pay of executives as they have don e with certain presenters such as  [20]  Graham Norton who earned  £2.5 million a year before agreeing to a pay cut and Bruce Forsyth. This will certainly ease the financial pressure on the BBC by reducing the magnitude of redundancies and manage the  £3.6 billion budget to maximum efficiency. Overall, the BBC has had its ups and downs but that is possibly down to the management and leadership of Mark Thompson. He is a respected journalist, however, this does not mean that he will be an implausible chief executive and this has been reflected in some of his decisions. The main two issues that must be resolved are the completion of the move to Salford Quays and the financial structure of the company with regard to executives and presenters. If both of these are achieved the BBC will be able to do what it does best which is to provide innovative and informative programmes and ensure value for money for licence fee payers.

Friday, October 25, 2019

Zechariah Essay -- essays research papers fc

Zechariah Zechariah is one of the Minor Prophets of the Old Testament. His book is located between the books of Haggai and Malachi. Zechariah is thought to have preached from about 520-518 B.C. The book of Zechariah deals with the restoration of Jerusalem, the Temple, and God‘s people. Chapter 11 verses 4-17, which is a story of two shepherds, is one of the most difficult passages in the Old Testament to understand. From the New Living Translation, the passage reads as follows: 4 This is what the LORD my God says: "Go and care for a flock that is intended for slaughter. 5 The buyers will slaughter their sheep without remorse. The sellers will say, 'Praise the LORD, I am now rich!' Even the shepherds have no compassion for them. 6 And likewise, I will no longer have pity on the inhabitants of the land," says the LORD. "I will let them fall into each other's clutches, as well as into the clutches of their king. They will turn the land into a wilderness, and I will not protec t them." 7 So I cared for the flock intended for slaughter – the flock that was oppressed. Then I took two shepherd's staffs and named one Favor and the other Union. 8 I got rid of their three evil shepherds in a single month. But I became impatient with these sheep – this nation – and they hated me, too. 9 So I told them, "I won't be your shepherd any longer. If you die, you die. If you are killed, you are killed. And those who remain will devour each other!" 10 Then I took my staff called Favor and snapped it in two, showing that I had revoked the covenant I had made with all the nations. 11 That was the end of my covenant with them. Those who bought and sold sheep were watching me, and they knew that the LORD was speaking to them through my actions. 12 And I said to them, "If you like, give me my wages, whatever I am worth; but only if you want to." So they counted out for my wages thirty pieces of silver. 13 And the LORD said to me, "Throw it to the potters" – this magnificent sum at which they valued me! So I took the thirty coins and threw them to the potters in the Temple of the LORD. 14 Then I broke my other staff, Union, to show that the bond of unity between Judah and Israel was broken. 15 Then the LORD said to me, "Go again and play the part of a worthless shepherd. 16 This will illustrate how I will give this nation a... ...ill leave them to be destroyed in the hands of the false prophets and corrupt leaders of the land. God tells them that he really does not want it to come to this, because the passage ends with a prophecy about what will become of the worthless shepherd. I think this is a message to false prophets that eventually no one will believe them, and also to the leaders or kings that they will lose all of their power and military strength. God reminds them that he really is helping protect them from the full effect of their sins even if they don’t realize it. In other words, things could be a lot worse, but God loves humans so much that he won’t let it get worse. The general message is for the people to clean up their act and repent so these bad things won’t happen. Bibliography Works Cited Chisholm, Robert B., Jr. Interpreting The Minor Prophets. Michigan: Zondervan Publishing House, 1990. Brown, William P. Westminster Bible Companion: Obadiah Through Malachi. Kentucky: Westminster John Knox Press, 1996. Holy Bible New Living Translation. Illinois: Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. 1996. Meyers, Carol L., and Eric M. Meyers. The Anchor Bible: Zechariah 9-14.New York: Doubleday. 1993.

Thursday, October 24, 2019

Advantages And Disadvantages Of An Armed Public

It is believed that the safest nations have very strict gun control laws. This strong gun control laws enhances a lower crime rate but that is not always the case. Virginia’s homicide rate is low among other states like the state of Maryland, where unless one is a police or federal officer it is illegal to carry a handgun. (Joyner, 2004).Many will argue that carrying firearms does not make America more dangerous but instead much safer. With a positive thought, if everyone were armed, crime would drop to an all time low. It's just a matter of weather you are educated in this matter or just shooting from the hip. (Kopel, 1995).The result of this is that a law-abiding citizen can get licenses to carry concealed firearms. With the gun crazies and their paranoia such as crazy shooting similar to the massacre at Virginia Tech, and the violence nannies and their hysteria such as drug related shootings, the issue of legalizing or not remains an ever more complicated mess.This paper ad dresses this issue by relating the advantages and disadvantages of an armed public.Pros Of An Armed Public Most legislatures have failed to reach a compromise on some significant issues like concealed carry gun laws and the issue continue bewildering. According to Al Marzouqi on The Badger Herald (2007), he believes that the ban on concealed carry does not automatically translate to relatively low crime rate, which is an important aspect of the discussion.The absence of crime is not a proof that a policy is working. Laws to restrain criminals’ form acquiring weapons do not stop them especially when they are bound on breaking the law. All a ban on concealed carry does is to create a false sense of security that is all too often shattered by a tragedy and prevents law abiding citizens from defending themselves in such situations.Secondly In a small town, backup is sometimes an absent luxury; good citizens with personal firearms can save the situation. Thirdly many lives might b e saved, just by the presence of a gun without necessarily meaning presence of the police.The law does not state that police should always be of aid if called or requested for any help. Police are not required to help and they cannot be sued if they DON'T help.California's Government Code, Sections 821, 845, and 846 states, in part: â€Å"Neither a public entity or a public employee [may be sued] for failure to provide adequate police protection or service, failure to prevent the commission of crimes and failure to apprehend criminals.†Lastly the number of unregistered guns is actually unknown, but it is probably in the multi-millions like the registered ones.These guns would be most difficult to locate, though readily available to the criminals. Handguns are made everywhere too because they are legal in some states and therefore a booming business, so to be successful in eliminating guns in the US, one must shut down the entire world's ammunition industries and their sales c hannels, which is basically impossible.Therefore the issue of not legalizing does not decrease the number of illegal arms, the criminals would still be armed and lack of the legal guns in a system lives the ordinary citizen disarmed.It is logical that a bully with a gun would not attack someone they knew were armed. Guns reduce the number of attempted crimes because criminals are uncertain which potential victims can defend themselves. States with the largest increases in gun ownership also have the largest drops in violent crimes according to Lott on More guns, less crime in 2000.Criminals are deterred by higher penalties. Just as higher arrest and conviction rates deter crime, so does the risk that someone committing a crime will confront on someone able to defend him or herself.The horrific shooting in Arkansas occurred in one of the few places where having guns was already illegal. These laws risk creating situations in which the good guys cannot defend themselves from the bad o nes. (Lott, 2000)Cons Of An Armed Public A gun owner is more likely to accidentally shoot an innocent person than shoot the burglar because they are highly annoyed at the time of the conflict. Secondly allowing people to carry concealed weapons brings about the likelihood of them falling into the wrong hands. Laws concealed carry state that a person applying for a permit must satisfy an existing criterion.The proposed criteria include age restrictions, background checks, legal citizenship, gun safety classes and mental stability. It is believed that with such procedures, the risks of guns falling into the wrong hands would diminish but this is simply not the case. There are several fundamental flaws with these limitations, including the fault on the licensing body.Thirdly laws to legalize owning of firearms would mean that if individuals meet all criteria for the permit, then the state cannot under any circumstances, withhold it from them unless there exist other laws giving a super vising body the right to withhold a permit from a qualified person.Lastly, release of arms to the public means that they will be highly accessible to unauthorized persons such as children in a family setting who can be able to access majority of the family recourses in exception of the firearms. According to HRW in 2006, between 1985 and 1994, murders committed by children with guns more than tripled in America.Crime rates in England and Australia England has strict gun control but their firearms related crime statistic has been steadily increasing. Originally homicides did not increase with the invention of firearms, but instead seems to have fallen sharply as guns became more efficient and widely owned in England. (Kates, 2002).There are enough historical facts that refute claims that guns cause homicide. Violent crime did not increase with increased gun ownership nor did it decline with decreased gun ownership. Firearms closely correlate with car ownership than firearms ownership in England and Swaziland. Like demographics, Geographic’s of gun ownership relate inversely to crime.Conclusion Concealed carry permits should be issued to those who qualify and be revoked when misused. This would also mean that people are not guaranteed permits and if permitted the state should have a right to withhold on matters of security concerns. Responsibilities do go with rights, and many people often conveniently forget that little tradeoff.Gun violence still remains unsolved because it’s unpredictable and uncontrollable.In line with Kate on the issue of if guns cause crime, the best currently available evidence indicates that general gun availability has no measurable net positive effect on crime rates. Guns availability has many effects on violence increases or decreases with the effects largely canceling each other.References: Al Marzouqi, A. (2007, October 30). The Badger Herald. Retrieved 20th July 2008 from: http://badgerherald.com/oped/2007/10/30/happi ness_is_a_warm_.phpHuman Rights Watch (HRW). (2006). Juvenile Crime Rates: Retrieved 20th July 2008 from: http://hrw.org/reports/2005/us0205/4.htmJoyner, J. (2004, July 15). Virginia Gun Laws: Outside the Beltway (OTB). Retrieved 20th July 2008 from: http://www.outsidethebeltway.com/archives/2004/07/virginia_gun_laws/Kates, D. (2002, July 22). Do Guns Cause Crime: History News Network. Retrieved 20th July 2008 from: http://hnn.us/articles/871.htmlKopel, D. (1995). International Perspective on Gun Control: New York Law School Journal. Retrieved 20th July 2008 from: http://www.davekopel.com/2a/LawRev/lrnylstk.htmLott, J. (2000). More Guns, Less Crime: Understanding Crime and Gun control: university of Chicago.

Wednesday, October 23, 2019

How well is Whole Foods Market performing from a strategic perspective? Essay

The chief elements of the strategy There are chief strategies are WHOLE FOOD, WHOLE PEOPLE and WHOLE PLANET. * Selling the Highest Quality Natural and Organic Products Available This is brand image of whole food market. And John Mackey created the first market in highest quality natural and organic products. It is successful. * Satisfying and Delighting Our Customers Worth of mouth is better than advertisement. Though the price more expensive than the other market, if customers have enough money, they are willing to buy highest quality and price natural and organic products in whole food market * Team Member Happiness and Excellence Make employee excellence; make customers happiness, Whole Food Market put customer in first, employees in second, shareholders in the end. * Creating Wealth Through Profits & Growth Sell highest quality health food in higher price not only earn more money but also can Survey of most or worse market demand * Caring About Our Communities & Our Environment Good environment about produce natural and Organic Products such as vegetable and animals growth in their growth cycle without chemical pesticide and Hormone WFM’s core values These core values are the soul of Whole Foods Market. * Their deepest purpose as an organization was helping support the health. Selling the highest quality natural and organic products is their goal. Now our life is becoming better and better, and many people more and more attention to their health. The price of Whole Foods Market are more expensive than other similar market, but customers also want to buy it. Because they have high quality products. * The customer is God. Company provides with the best customer service, more meaningful value products and has a competitive price to customers. Try to achieve or exceed customer expectations as much as possible, and then help company to improve other performance. So, satisfying and delighting customers is very important. * The company has a good internal environment. Let employees can try their best to get a good job. Team members will communicate and cooperate with each other and obtain the many kinds of information and knowledge. Employees can creative more ideas. Using the power of groups to make an effort to company. The key of contributed to Whole Foods Market success are highest quality, satisfying customers and team force. How well is Whole Foods Market performing from a strategic perspective? Is the strategy working? Does the company have a winning strategy? The Whole Foods brand stands for best- quality, organic goods, is performing well from a strategic prospective as they are increasing their locations and markets. They continue to provide healthy high quality foods and brands that are good for consumers, the environment, and their own growth in the industry. Whole food appeals to a greater social responsibility and has a strong distribution network. They have a competitive advantage to other supermarkets because of their high and fine products that they carry. This company had different acquisitions. One of the acquisitions Whole Food had was when they bought Wild Oats Market. This was a good acquisition Whole Foods made because it opened a lot of opportunities to success as a better company. Whole Foods also has the advantage of a well-known name that’s associated with a higher quality for supermarket products at more competitive prices. Whole Foods has a variety of products and brand selection. These included some 30,000 natural, organic, and gourmet food products and nonfood items. The company has a broad range of products including beverages, snacks, frozen items, pantry staples and different supplements. In addition, Whole Foods appraise quality by nutrition, freshness, and appearance. This company put a lot of emphasis in the health of their customers; therefore the company wants to offer the best quality possible. Recommendations 1. Deferment of Expansion Market: carrying cooperation approach is more cost-effective. You can also detection of this place is whether or not suitable for whole food to survive. The characteristics products and self-owned brand of the food put on the supermarket of cooperation to sale is very good way. 2. Adjust Measures to Local Conditions each busy section or prosperous business district faces high-end consumers is not the same. For example cooperation with the Chinese market , if whole food will open in Shanghai, because the Shanghai is the cosmopolitan city, The high-end supermarket target consumer groups will be mainly focused on a foreign high-end consumers. High quality high level of the organic food will no longer be whole food characteristics, but can afford a high price of people would not less. If whole food market will locate in Xiamen, high quality high level of the organic food can be whole food characteristics, not like Shanghai that would have so many people to buy. 3. Local Culture: Internationalization is a huge barrier, China is a large agricultural country, cooperation with the Chinese Farm, into some of the local culture, it can cut down the price, and also can helps to keep food fresh cooperation with the local farm, launch of the local characteristics of organic food, so as to attract more high-end consumers. Road transport conditions of China are good; it has a great degree of protection for fresh food

Tuesday, October 22, 2019

Don Quixote and Chivalric Ideals

Don Quixote and Chivalric Ideals Free Online Research Papers During the era of Miguel de Cervantes, the ideals of chivalry and knighthood were the prominent themes in literature. Romantic tales of valiant knights and love captured the imaginations of medieval readers, and this influence proved still to be strong during the Renaissance. In the fifteenth century, these medieval values clashed with the new emphasis on reason. The influence of both sets of values can be seen in the Miguel de Cervantess novel, Don Quixote. In this work, Cervantes illustrates the idealistic character of Don Quixote, who is possesed by chivalric ideas of heroism and valor. Don Quixote sets out to reform the world along with his sensible companion Sancho Panca. After an ill-starred career as a knight-errant, Don Quixote renounces his ideals and is restored to excessive sensibility. At the same time, Sancho Panca champions the very ideas that Don Quixote comes to reject. Through his use of names and through the naive ideals of Don Quixote and his subsequent exchange of beliefs with Sancho Panca, Cervantes reveals the need for a proper balance between the extremes of idealism and rationalism. The subject of names is a prevalent one in Cervantess work. Cervantes begins the work with the peculiar declaration, In a certain village in La Mancha, the name of which I do not choose to remember, Don Quixote makes his residence. The anonymity of the village parallels Cervantess ambiguity when discussing Don Quixotes real name. He explains that he is said to have gone by the name of Quijada, or Quesada, although it is most likely that he was called Quijada. Cervantess deliberate manner of forgetting and his vagueness in relating Don Quixotes real name contrasts sharply with Don Quixotes own naming of things. In taking on his new role as knight-errant, he assumes the name Don Quixote de la Mancha, which, according to him reveals his lineage and honors his fortunate country.† In fact, Quixote signifies the armor that a knight wears to protect his thigh. In choosing this inglorious name, the title character shows his distorted sense of what is admirable. Don Quixote also selects the satisfactory name, Rosinante, for his horse, connoting a hack or nag. Furthermore, when he selects a healthy, buxom, country wench to fall in love with, he gives her the name Dulcinea del Toboso, which he regards as romantic, musical, and expressive, like the names he had chosen for himself and his horse. With such bizarre names that do not suit their subjects, Don Quixotes skewed perspective on life is shown. While Cervantes goes to one extreme and decides to forget the name of a town, Don Quixote intentionally picks out ridiculous names for himself, his horse, and his lady. With the absurdity of these extremes, Cervantes asserts the necessity of finding the middle ground. With the name of Quixote, the title character is presented as a comical, ludicrous figure. Cervantes refers to him often as the poor gentleman who has lost his senses and who has the brain of a madman. During his time as a knight-errant, Don Quixote travels far and wide seeking adventures and righting wrongs. In his mission to save the world, Don Quixote is inspired by the books he read of knights, chivalry, and honor. Everything he does is modeled on these romantic stories, into which Don Quixote immerses himself completely. He explains to Sancho Panca that knights-errant are not permitted to complain of any wound they receive. But he permits his squire to complain, as he had not read anything to the contrary in his books of knight-errantry. Another instance of Don Quixotes reliance on the model of his books occurs when stays awake thinking of his Lady Dulcinea because he read about those knights-errant who passed many sleepless nights in woods and deserts remembering their ladies. Thus, Don Quixote shapes his whole life around the fictional accounts of imaginary figures and looses control of his own life. During his adventurous journey, his â€Å"squire,† Sancho Panca, accompanies this would-be knight. This devoted servant is much more temporal than his master, and Sancho revels in such pleasures as plentiful food and a luxurious slumber. Sancho Panca shows his practicality when he warns Don Quixote of the foolishness of some of his missions. When Don Quixote plans to attack the perceived giants in fierce and unequal combat, Sancho implores him to see correctly that the giants are merely windmills. In addition to bestowing rational advice on his master, Sancho puts his trust in God, saying at various points, Gods will be done, and Lord have mercy upon us. While Don Quixote puts his faith in his tales of chivalry, Sancho relies on God for mercy and guidance, and with his rational behavior represents a great contrast to the senselessness of his master. The traits of master and servant are reversed, however, when Don Quixote is defeated in battle and returns home to renounce all his previously held beliefs. Suffering a severe sickness, Don Quixote is eventually restored to consciousness, and he at once declares that God is merciful and that he is now cleared of those dark shadows of ignorance that clouded his understanding from incessant reading of those detestable books of chivalry. This startling reversal in thought causes his friends to think that his sudden and easy transition from madness to sanity is a certain signal of his approaching death. Cervantes thus equates sanity with death: at a time when most people begin to lose their minds, Don Quixote is at his most rational. Another drastic transformation occurs in Sancho Panca. Upon seeing his master renounce his beliefs, Sancho entreats him to once again espouse chivalric ideals. Sancho encourages him to Get up and go walking in the fields with the hope that behind some bush t hey may find Lady Dulcinea. It is now Sancho who defends the absurd ideas that once deluded Don Quixote. It is unusually easy for both characters to exchange beliefs. Cervantes is therefore expressing the impossibility of remaining faithful to extreme beliefs such as those Don Quixote and Sancho Panca hold at different points in their lives. The logical conclusion, thus, is to find a middle road to which one can hold firm. The balance between idealism and reality is often difficult to find. The struggle to reach a middle ground is illustrated in Miguel de Cervantess novel, Don Quixote. Through the characters of Don Quixote and Sancho Panca, Cervantes illustrates the challenges individuals face to balance their lives with a mix of idealistic and rational thought. Cervantes establishes this struggle through the issue of names. In Cervantess forgetting the name of the village and in Don Quixotes deliberately giving absurd names to things, the folly of adopting extreme notions is shown. Cervantes follows with examples of excessive idealism and rationalism. In connecting sanity with death, Cervantes seems to dismiss rational thought as pointless. But his portrayal of Don Quixotes foolishness in his knightly adventures also illustrates a kind of futility. And in the two characters reversals at the end, Cervantes reveals that it is worthless to only adopt a single way of thinking. The two ends of idealism and pragmatism, however, must both exist in a persons life. If not for Sanchos rationalism, Don Quixotes journey would have been quite difficult. Likewise, without Don Quixotes fantasies, Sanchos life would have lacked entertainment. Such a story as Don Quixotes would not exist if not for the imagination; at the same time, it would be ridiculous to accept this story as truth and not consider it from a realistic point of view. Through this charming, yet sobering, tale, Cervantes illustrates that a proper balance between idealism and practicality must be achieved, and that without both principles, life is fruitless. Research Papers on Don Quixote and Chivalric IdealsHonest Iagos Truth through DeceptionWhere Wild and West MeetAnalysis Of A Cosmetics AdvertisementResearch Process Part One19 Century Society: A Deeply Divided EraEffects of Television Violence on ChildrenPersonal Experience with Teen PregnancyMind TravelTrailblazing by Eric AndersonThe Masque of the Red Death Room meanings

Monday, October 21, 2019

Rosa Luxemburg essays

Rosa Luxemburg essays Rosa Luxemburg was arguably one of the finest political theorists of the 20th century. Luxemburg was a German revolutionary leader, journalist, and socialist theorist. She lived the international life of a Socialist pilgrim, believing that only socialism could bring true freedom and social justice. Luxemburg was the advocate of mass action, spontaneity, and workers democracy but her criticism of the revisionist position of Edward Bernstein is considered her most important legacy to European political thought. Rosa Luxemburg was born into a middle class, Jewish family on March 5, 1871, in the small town of Zamosc in southeastern Russian Poland in the year of the Paris commune. She was the youngest out of five children, three boys and two girls. Her father lacked the knack for business. When his fortunes declined and his familys needs grew he decided to try his luck in the capital. When Rosa was two and a half years old her family moved to Warsaw, where she grew up (Waters 1). At the age of five she developed a serious hip ailment, and had to spend nearly a year in bed. While bedridden for that year she taught herself to read. The disease was wrongly diagnosed as tuberculosis and wrongly treated. She never fully recovered from the disease and walked with a slight limp for the rest of her life (Waters 1). At the age of thirteen, Rosa entered the second girls high school in Warsaw. She graduated on June 14,1887 with an excellent academic record. She was supposed to have received a gold metal that she had earned for academic achievements, but was denied because of her rebellious attitude towards the authorities (Feminist). At sixteen she found her soul mates in the social-minded students in the underground circles. She became active in the underground revolutionary movement during her high school years. She joined a small cell of the Proletariat Party, which was allied with the terrorist Narodnik, or Populist, movemen...

Sunday, October 20, 2019

Braving the Middle School Book Talk

Braving the Middle School Book Talk When we writers began our quest in the literary world, we held several fantasies.â€Å"My book will sell more than Harry Potter†, â€Å"Johnny Depp will call and beg me to let him produce my book into a movie†, â€Å"Stephen King and I will be on a first name basis† (come on, I can’t be the ONLY one thinking of this!). But then we write, and lo and behold, that status doesn’t come, the fame and money dont come but other things come. Maybe you receive local recognition, an invite to do a book talk at a local book club, or school, or library. After a local newspaper mentioend my locally-published middle grade book, I was approached This is my fourth year of doing book talks to middle grade students, and I have come across some interesting tidbits I thought might help my fellow literary artists out there. Public speaking is a common fear. I used to be the lead singer in a band, and I had to talk, and I was scared to death of it. That was years ago. Of course since then stage fright has multiplied – and then to think, â€Å"You have to talk to kids! They have the attention span of†¦ a gnat!† Well that’s what teachers kept telling me anyway, but†¦ I approached my very first book talk in pretty much the same way I approach my writing. â€Å"Don’t think about it, keep a short outline in your head, step up, do it ignore the outline.† Truly, some people are better off at winging it, but for those of you who aren’t, here’s some advice from someone who has had to stand in front of ‘tweens’ for three years running. 1. Don’t be afraid. These are kids, they don’t work for the I.R.S. 2. You are their entertainment. You being there means they don’t have to do class work. They want you there! 3. Exude the joy of writing to them. They need to see it, feel it, hear it in your presentation or you’re just another grown up, talking. 4. Be prepared. Have samples, teasers, book marks. They love taking that stuff. True it may never make it home, but some of it will. 5. Plan entertaining answers for common question like: a. Are you rich and/or famous? My challenge to this is to let them know that though we can eventually gain a mass of riches, we write for the love of writing. One question I always ask is â€Å"How many of you here like to write?† and it never fails, I get one or two hands go up in a classroom, and they aren’t excited to let their friends know this. So my response is â€Å"That’s great. How many love to read?† More hands go up. â€Å"Well there ya go, you can’t read unless someone is writing, so you couple of writers will be fueling their reading hunger, get started.† b. â€Å"Miss Jones says that when we write, we have to do re-writes. How many times do you have to re-write the same story?† Answer? â€Å"Do you have a favorite song? Do you know it c. â€Å"I can never get ideas, all my ideas come from books I already know.† Answer:   â€Å"Ideas are all around you, just look for them. Writing to me is like a puzzle. It comes in pieces then as you write it puts itself together.† An example I give in every class is this one : â€Å"You know when you go to the grocery store with your mom and the cashier has a name tag ‘My name is Brian, ask me about my dog’. What about Brian’s dog? Well Fluffy died two weeks ago, but Brian has it in his freezer because he loves that dog and just can’t let go – and yes that’s dead dog hair on your Lucky Charms.† It always gets a laugh. Ideas are everywhere, a good exercise is to ask someone what they did over the weekend, and expand from there – and even make it a quick game. â€Å"We went to the zoo.† â€Å"Ahh, ok, so suppose you were at the zoo, and as you walked Basically, the audience wants you to sway them. They need to see the fire to write in you, and you will inspire. I love to share the fact that when I was in middle school I spent almost all of my time drawing comic books – or graphic novels as they like to call them these days – and that I credit my high school English teacher in lighting the fire in me to write. She pulled me aside one day and said â€Å"Why don’t you try writing a short story, I think you could do it.† I did. She liked it, and the rest is history. If you are an author of YA or Middle Grade books, contact the media specialist or lead teacher at your local schools and ask for a chance to speak with the kids. A good time for this is either during the month of November which is NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month), or during your local schools National Literacy Week. Either way you can wow them with your literary artistic skill and craft. Make us proud.

Saturday, October 19, 2019

Informal interview Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 1250 words

Informal interview - Essay Example What are the core competencies and skills needed by an individual in order to be successful as the HR Director? What is your perspective of the HRD in an organization? What are the implications of the importance of the role of HRD on the top management in an organization? Interview summary The professional interviewed was Mr. Ali Javaid. He has five years of experience as a human resource director (HRD) in Sunshine Company. There is a whole range of job duties and responsibilities assigned to Ali by his company. As the HRD of the company, Ali manages the activities to hire the personnel, develop their skills as per the needs of the company, motivates them using different types of strategies, and ensures that the performance of the workforce is up to the standards established by the company. Ali oversees the process of recruitment including the development and circulation of notices about the employment opportunities, advertising, application screening, establishment of the schedules of interview, and contacting the interested candidates after the completion of the process of recruitment. Ali assumes the responsibility to circulate and coordinate all information and documentation about the evaluation of the employees. He ensures the compliance of the organization with the practices of equal opportunity and employment established by the state (â€Å"Director of Human†). Ali regularly develops new programs of employee orientation. He administers the benefits and provides the employees with information about retirement and personnel benefits. Salary schedules are maintained and updated by him. Ali has established and maintains an electronic system of employee records that consists of the employees’ application materials, licensure documentation, official transcripts, and documents. Ali prepares all sorts of contracts and other documents about compensation and employment. He also monitors the vacations and leaves of the employees. He also prepares and delivers the payroll information. These are only few of the duties and responsibilities performed by Ali in the company as its HRD. The main competencies needed to be successful as a HR Director include negotiation skills, job knowledge, qualified recruitment, effective training, and the power to influence others. Successful HR Directors have such communication skills that enable them to communicate in a way that is a win win situation for the employees and the company. Each organization has certain constraints while employees have their own needs. HR Directors listen to the concerns of the employees and help them understand the organization’s position and tendency to resolve their problems. This requires good interpersonal skills which a HR Director must have in order to succeed. The HR Director should have comprehensive job knowledge (Heisler). He should have a firm understanding of the job duties and responsibilities along with comprehensive knowledge of the applicable saf ety regulations, labor laws, and state and federal policies. The core competency of recruitment means that the HR Director minimizes the expenditures of the company related to the advertisement of job and the selection process. It also means that the HR Director should be qualified enough to establish a fair system of skill evaluation to select the right personnel for the company. The HR Director should have knowledge of the latest developments and advancements of technology so as to make best use of them for the training and skill development of the employees at the

Friday, October 18, 2019

Teaching assignment Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 1000 words

Teaching assignment - Essay Example The plans are devised to improve the working skills of the students in linguistics. Many African mothers carry, or nestle, their babies on their backs. This custom has advantages for both mother and child. A working woman, who has nobody to look after the baby, knows he is safe on her back, while her hands are free for her work. Meanwhile, the baby stays in close contact with his mother and feels warm and safe. This sense of security may be suddenly broken, however, when the child can no longer be carried, he may be put down and expected to behave like a grown up child. But as he has been over-protected for so long through nestling that he now feels very insecure and may behave like a baby. Children need freedom and the chance to use their limbs. They need to be able to observe and explore their environment. They also need to learn how to make and do things on their own. Therefore, even when mothers must carry their babies everywhere, they should try to set them free whenever possible. a. Look at the picture. What do you think it is about? Which part of the world do you think this woman is from? All right, you now know that the woman is from Africa and she is carrying a baby on her back. You know a bit about the picture. By presenting the above-mentioned lesson plan I have observed the following learning outcome in the working skills of the student with respect to English language. The student was able to understand the meaning of nestling. He was able to generate a discussion on how babies are cared in villages and cities. He was able to do the following: The student was in need of audio visual aid that he or she must be provided with some sort of audio visual aid. The lesson plan was presented in a good style which enhanced the abilities of the student but not at a mature level. He or she was in need of more hard work. In the subject plan the student was provided with the

The impact of corporate social responsibility on organisational Essay

The impact of corporate social responsibility on organisational effectiveness - Essay Example The article also focuses the value of those components for the stakeholders of the companies. The article further segregates the ethical component of the corporate social responsibility in order ton relate it to some major ethic management approaches, which include moral, immoral, and amoral managements. I think the author of the article has written the article in a well-structured format. The article is easy to read, as well as easy to understand for the readers. All sections of the article are well-organized and provide a clear view of the author’s thoughts. The article is also based on the logical facts about the significance of corporate social responsibility in achieving higher levels of productivity. The author has also focused on ethical and moral; management approaches which is also an important part of the article. The article relates to our research in a way that it makes us aware of ways executives can use corporate social responsibility to fulfill their responsibilities that they owe towards their shareholders and other competing groups. This article focuses of how managers can use finance to make the organization socially responsible and responsive. Of course, finance always play a critical role in almost every organizational matter and corporate social responsibility is no exception. The author puts his views on the criticism regarding corporate social responsibility that it is of little significance of companies as it used mostly as a tool of enhancing public relations. The article reveals that many organizations actually incorporate corporate social responsibility in their daily business activities but are unaware of the way to report that responsiveness in a formal way. Moreover, the article focuses on how accountants can use their knowledge in developing CSR and reporting the metrics to show the organizational involvement in social responsiveness. I have found the article to be very useful in learning the role of

Chosse any theme and write after reading NADJA by ANDRE BRETON Essay

Chosse any theme and write after reading NADJA by ANDRE BRETON - Essay Example The story is not only a case-study of a woman with profound perception of the world and life, who later descends into madness, but also follows the writer’s personal transformation as well. (Watson et.al. 2002) The novel became a momentous contribution while the movement was still in its embryonic stage. The plot revolves around the author’s obsession with a woman named Nadja, whom he meets in Paris. She haunts the author for a considerable amount of time, but by the end of the novel she is institutionalized after being diagnosed with ‘schizophrenia’. It is a tragic fate for Nadja, but her insanity is deemed as the prime source of conflict for the narrator and paves the path of self-discovery for him. While Nadja loses herself in an asylum, the author subsequently finds himself through the establishment of surrealist consciousness. The relationship between Nadja and the author is described through vague metaphors in a non-linear fashion with 44 pictures that depict pictures of their rendezvous points, Nadja’s sketches and surrealist art. Conception of surrealist notions was triggered by the psychodynamic paradigm that proposed that thought processes and behaviors were caused by the interaction between conscious and the unconscious mind. According to this paradigm, the main driving force behind such interaction is an individual’s sex drive or libido. However, unlike using the model to understand or resolve mental conflicts, surrealists use it as a form of artistry. The surrealist elements are not only ostensible through the notions discussed in the novel, but the sentence structuring and vocabulary also contain the same essence. Besides the titular character that embodied mystery, the vocabulary and metaphors are most cryptic in nature and give the novel the elements of both poetry and a prose. Nadja herself had been an avid lover of various surrealist artists and writers,

Thursday, October 17, 2019

Private Language in The Philosophy of Wittgenstein Essay

Private Language in The Philosophy of Wittgenstein - Essay Example In the Tractatus Wittgenstein argued that there is much deeper connection between words and the world than that the mere notion that words stand for things. Wittgenstein saw a structural similarity between language and the world, so that the structure of reality could actually be read off the structure of language. The notion of correspondence, with its attendant conception of meaning as static, was abandoned in the later philosophy. In the Preface to his Philosophical Investigations, Wittgenstein (1953) writes, "For since beginning to occupy myself with philosophy again, sixteen years ago, I have been forced to recognize grave mistakes in what I wrote in that first book" (p.vi). What Wittgenstein came to recognize was that it is ill conceived to think that words always have fixed meanings. Rather, meaning is dynamic in the sense that it can only be determined by the interpretation that language users give it as they use it. In section 43 of Investigations, he tells us, "For a large class of cases— though not for all—in which we employ the word meaning it can be defined thus: the meaning of a word is its use in the language." The idea of meaning as use is the principle idea advanced in the Investigations. Searle (1998) points out that whereas Wittgensteins earlier philosophy revolves around the metaphor of language as a picture, his later philosophy revolves around the metaphor of language as a tool. The difference between the two metaphors is crucial. When Wittgenstein said that words are like pictures, he was operating on the assumption that words, like pictures, represent. When Wittgenstein said that words are like tools, he was trying to stress that words, like tools, can be used in many different ways and for many different purposes. Wittgensteins contention that in most cases, the meaning of a word is its use suggests that the same word could mean different things at different times

What is the relevance of Marxism to critical theory Give examples of Essay

What is the relevance of Marxism to critical theory Give examples of practices - Essay Example According to Marxism, to understand the dialectical of history individuals should focus on the human agents which exist within relatively enduring social structures of which the agent reproduce or alter through their various actions. Moreover, it argues that the dialectical view of the society challenges the empiricist approaches used in the study of principles governing human and social life. In a much wider perspective, Marxism works to define politics in an expansive manner since politics is seen as struggle over the shaping of the kind of world we live and the identity of people we are (Rabaka, 2009). On the other hand, capitalism can be defined as a form of social life which is based on historically specific class relations between the class of people owning capital and those acting as wage laborers. In as much capitalism is considered to be productive but in away disabling, exploitative and undemocratic to those areas or sectors where it is being applied. Marxism further argues that capitalist accumulation is what drives major capitalist countries into colonial expansionism, creating the potential for inter-imperialist rivalry on a global scale. In making explanations for politics, Marxism and critical theory examines in details the structures of global capitalism and the ideologies and agents situated within the specific structures. It places emphasis on the capital driven nature of the state‘s action in the global capitalist systems and the need for states to maintain control of oil in order to maintain global capitalism in the world. An example is that from a Marxist c ritical theory, the war on terror should be understood in the context of ideology of economic security (Kellner, 1989). According to Karl Marx, socialist and dialectical theories Marxism, critical theory examines fictitious works as a manifestation of the societal foundations which plays a key role in their establishment (Pawling, 2013). Marxist views elements of

Wednesday, October 16, 2019

Private Language in The Philosophy of Wittgenstein Essay

Private Language in The Philosophy of Wittgenstein - Essay Example In the Tractatus Wittgenstein argued that there is much deeper connection between words and the world than that the mere notion that words stand for things. Wittgenstein saw a structural similarity between language and the world, so that the structure of reality could actually be read off the structure of language. The notion of correspondence, with its attendant conception of meaning as static, was abandoned in the later philosophy. In the Preface to his Philosophical Investigations, Wittgenstein (1953) writes, "For since beginning to occupy myself with philosophy again, sixteen years ago, I have been forced to recognize grave mistakes in what I wrote in that first book" (p.vi). What Wittgenstein came to recognize was that it is ill conceived to think that words always have fixed meanings. Rather, meaning is dynamic in the sense that it can only be determined by the interpretation that language users give it as they use it. In section 43 of Investigations, he tells us, "For a large class of cases— though not for all—in which we employ the word meaning it can be defined thus: the meaning of a word is its use in the language." The idea of meaning as use is the principle idea advanced in the Investigations. Searle (1998) points out that whereas Wittgensteins earlier philosophy revolves around the metaphor of language as a picture, his later philosophy revolves around the metaphor of language as a tool. The difference between the two metaphors is crucial. When Wittgenstein said that words are like pictures, he was operating on the assumption that words, like pictures, represent. When Wittgenstein said that words are like tools, he was trying to stress that words, like tools, can be used in many different ways and for many different purposes. Wittgensteins contention that in most cases, the meaning of a word is its use suggests that the same word could mean different things at different times

Tuesday, October 15, 2019

Gun related crime in the U.S Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 1000 words

Gun related crime in the U.S - Essay Example One of the main reasons for failure of regulation is the attitude of federal government towards guns distribution; it pays virtually no attention to the design, manufacture, or marketing of guns. The two agencies with potential jurisdiction over these matters, the BATF and the Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC) currently lack the authority to address them. This lack of federal supervision of the gun industry allows several dangerous conditions to persist since 1983. (Jacobs, 2002, p. 19) Now, the question arises whether or not gun regulation can control violence in the U.S History (1970 and 1980) reveals that gun control regulation has never been helpful in crime reduction. This is evident from regression analysis, state data, and experimenting social and economic variables, which Murray (1975) concludes, "gun control laws have no significant effect on rates of violence beyond what can be attributed to background social conditions". In addition, he observes that "controlling for basic social factors, the data show that gun laws have no significant effect on access to firearms and differing rates of access to handguns had no significant effect on violent acts" (Murray 1975). According to Gorman & Kopel (2000) the gun control regulation has reduced the number of legal firearms in the ... If we analyze UK historical significance of gun regulation, it is evident that England and Wales had lower rates of robbery and burglary than the United States (in 1981)". (Gorman & Kopel, 2000) "Unfortunately, the British government's single-minded devotion to eliminating defensive arms has made life more dangerous for British citizens. In the United States, youth is more afraid of running into an armed homeowner than the police. As a result, the hot burglary rate today and the rate of crimes that occur when the householder is home is 13 percent in the United States and about 50 percent in England and Wales". (Gorman & Kopel, 2000) That means crime in UK is more vulnerable towards violence than in U.S. According to a review of firearm statistics in Canada, Australia has by far adopted the best policy in combating gun violence and control and has a solution to this problem. "Even though an estimated one in five Australian households contained a gun before the 1996 legislation, Australia has always had relatively few problems with firearms when compared with other industrialized nations. According to a 1995 report done for the Canadian Department of Justice, Australian homicide rates were very low by worldwide standards, and only 18 Australians died in accidents with firearms in 1993". (Aus, 2006a) This might be the result of the "Australian Government's approach to firearm regulation which seeks to achieve a balance between allowing those with a genuine need to possess and use firearms and providing a safe and secure environment for the broader community. In particular, the Australian Government is supportive of the legitimate use of firearms by

Monday, October 14, 2019

Isolation of β-Amyrin from Plant Parts of M. barteri

Isolation of ÃŽ ²-Amyrin from Plant Parts of M. barteri ISOLATION AND BIOLOGICAL ACTIVITY OF THE TRITERPENE Î’-AMYRIN FROM THE AERIAL PLANT PARTS OF MAESOBOTRYABARTERI(BAILL). Abstract Maesobotrya  barteri(Baill), belonging to the family EUPHORBIACEAE, is a medicinal plant growing widely in tropical Africa. The Aerial plant parts of Maesobotrya barteri (Bail) were collected fresh from Orokam, Ogbadibo local Government of Benue State, Nigeria in July, 2013. Taxonomical identification was done by Mallam Musa Abdullahi at the Herbarium unit of Biological sciences Department, ABU, Zaria, Nigeria. Pulverized aerial parts of Maesobotrya  barteri (960g) was exhaustively extracted successively using petroleum ether, chloroform, ethylacetate and methanol and concentrated in the rotary evaporator at 40oC. The ethylacetate fraction having the highest activity against test microbes from preliminary crude microbial screenings was subjected to phytochemical studies, antimicrobial analysis and column chromatography (CC). The column chromatography yielded fraction EN, which was further purified using preparative thin layer chromatography to give EN1. The structure of the isola ted compound was established using 1-D NMR and 2-D NMR spectroscopic analysis and by direct comparism with data reported in literature was confirmed to be ÃŽ ²-amyrin. The bioactivity of this compound was carried out using some clinical pathogens and the activity compared with standard drugs and this was found to be comparable with the standard drug. Keywords: Maesobotrya  barteri; Medicinal plant; bioactivity; Ethylacetate extract; ÃŽ ²-amyrin Introduction Maesobotrya sp is a variety of flowering plant belonging to the family Phyllanthaceae, or by some authors classified in Euphorbiaceae. The Euphorbiaceae plants are shrubs, trees, herbs or rarely lianas [1]. Plants of the Euphorbiaceae are known to be rich in terpenoids (69.5%) [2]. In Nigeria, the species M.barteri is under-exploited although the tree is of both medicinal and nutritional importance [3]. Maesobotrya species are used medicinally in different regions in Africa [4]. It bears succulent black-purple fruits that are edible and stain the tongue. The nutritive values of the fruits and seeds have been studied in Southern Nigeria [5]. Thus, this study aims at validating the antimicrobial effects of the aerial plant parts of Maesobotrya barteri used in traditional medicine in Orokam town of Benue State,Nigeria, as well as potent compounds that can be used as precursors for synthetic drugs. The presence of secondary metabolites in plants generally has been confirmed by [6], [7] and [8] through useful procedures and suggestions to get to targeted precursors which are of useful aids in the formulation of modern drugs. Plant Material The aerial parts of Maesobotrya barteri were collected from Orokam in Ogbadibo local government area of Benue State in the month of July, 2013. They were properly identified at the herbarium, Department of Biological Sciences, Ahmadu Bello University, Zaria. The whole plant was sorted, air dried under shade, segregated and pulverized by mechanically pounding them using wooden mortar and pestle. The pulverized plant material was stored away from moisture. Extraction 980.54g of the pulverized plant materials were carefully weighed and loaded into a Soxhlet extractor. It was extracted successively with Petroleum ether (60-80oC), Chloroform, Ethyl acetate (76-78oC) and Methanol by hot continuous percolation method in the Soxhlet apparatus for 72 hours respectively. Solvents used were those of JHD and general purpose reagents The extracts were concentrated in vacuo at 40oC using rotary evaporator and subjected to air drying to give dried crude extracts. Isolation The ethyl acetate extract was the most sensitive extract from the antimicrobial screening and was subjected to column chromatography (CC) for fractionation. Solvents used to run the column chromatograghy were sealed and are products JHD with 98% purity. Fifteen grams (15g) of the extract was dissolved in ethyl acetate and preadsorbed on 10.0g silica gel (qualikens 60-120 mesh). The dried pre-adsorbed extract was transferred to a mortar and ground to give a fine powder and was added at the uniform layer on top of the column. The petroleum ether descended on a horizontal line indicating that the column was well packed. A total of 105 fractions (50mls) each were initially collected using gradient elution with a solvent combination of petroleum ether and ethyl acetate, starting with 100% petroleum ether with an increasing polarity of 1% ethyl acetate. Similar fractions were pulled together based on monitoring from TLC. Fractions F20-F25 were pulled together at the ration of 8:2 and where subjected to further purification using Preparative thin layer chromatography to obtain a solid white amorphous substance which after several trails using different solvent combinations showed a single spot which was visible under the UV lamp and after spraying the TLC plate with 10% H2SO4 and oven dried for 5minutes at 60oC. The solid white amorphous substance produced was insoluble in ethyl acetate or petroleum ether but soluble in chloroform. Results and Discussion From the preliminary antimicrobial screening of the crude aerial plant parts extracts of M. barteri, ethylacetate extract exhibited the highest activity against the test microbes used via their zones of inhibition. Therefore, an activity guided isolation was undertaken. Bioactivity of Compound EN1 Pure Isolate The antimicrobial activities of compound EN1 isolated from ethylacetate extract of the aerial plant parts of M. barteri was examined and agar disc diffusion method [13] was employed for the determination of the antimicrobial activities. The pure compound was determined using some pathogenic microbes; the microbes were obtained from the department of Medical Microbiology Ahmadu Bello University Teaching- Hospital, Zaria, Nigeria. The determination of minimum inhibitory concentration was carried out using the nutrient broth susceptibility assay prepared according to the manufacturer’s instructions, as recommended by NCCLS [14]. Minimum inhibition McFarland turbidity standard scale number 0.5 was prepared to give turbid solution. Normal saline was prepared and was dispensed into test tube and the test microorganism was then inoculated into the normal saline, incubation was at 37oC for 6hrs, dilution of the microorganism in the normal was performed until the turbidity marched that of the McFarland by visual comparison at this point the microorganism had a concentration of about 1.5à Ã‚ ¥108 cfu/ml. Minimum Bactericidal and fungicidal concentration of compound EN1 was carried out to check whether the test microbes were killed or only their growth was inhibited. Mueller Hunton agars were prepared according to the manufacturer’s instruction, as recommended by NCCLS [14]. They were boiled to dissolve and were sterilized at 121oC for 15 minutes, the media were cool to 45oC and the medium (20ml) was poured in to sterile Petri dishes, the plates were covered and allowed to cool and solidify. The contents of the MIC in the serial dilution was inoculated on to the media, the media were incubated at 37oC for 24hrs for the bacteria and at 30oC for 1-7 days for fungi, after which the plate were observed for colonies growth. The MBC/MFC was the plate with lowest concentrations of the extract without colony growth. Table 2 shows the Zones of inhibition (mm) of the pure the compound EN1 from the ethyl acetate fraction which showed remarkable activity against twelve of the sixteen organisms tested. Compound EN1 could not inhibit the growth of Corynebacterium ulcerans, Candida albicans, Candida tropicalis, Aspergillus fumigates, Aspergillus nigre. The various minimum inhibitory concentration (MIC) and minimum Bacteriocidal concentration and fungicidal concentration (MBC/MFC) for the different microbes are as shown in Tables and the bioactivity of the aerial plant parts of M. barteri is comparable to the drugs Ciprofloxacin, Fluconazole and Fulcin used as positive controls. Table 2: Zone of inhibition of Compound EN1 against the test microorganism Test Organism Compound EN1 Ciprofloxacin Fluconazole Fulcin Staphylococus aureus 32 37 0 0 Streptococus pyogenes 30 35 0 0 Streptococcus feacalis 32 39 0 0 Corynebacteruim ulcerans 0 32 0 0 Escherichia coli 32 38 0 0 Klebsiella pneumonia 32 40 0 0 Salmonella typhi 30 42 0 0 Shigella dysenteriae 30 40 0 0 Candida albicans 0 0 35 0 Candida krusei 27 0 37 0 Candida tropicalis 0 0 32 0 Candida stellatoidea 25 0 37 0 Microsporum sp 26 0 0 38 Aspargillus fumigates 0 0 0 32 Aspargillus nigre 0 0 0 34 Trichophyton rutarum 28 0 0 38 Table 2 and 3 shows the activity of the compound EN1 which the spectroscopic analysis was proposed to be a ÃŽ ²-Amyrin or ÃŽ ²-Amyrenol, (C30H50O, 426.7 g/mol). Antimicrobial screening reported from other natural products has also confirmed the microbial properties of ÃŽ ²-Amyrin. ÃŽ ²-Amyrin was isolated from Ardisia elliptica [9], a medicinal plant used for alleviating chest pain, fever, liver poisoning and parturition complications. It was found that ÃŽ ²-Amyrin was six times as active as aspirin in inhibiting platelets aggregation. ÃŽ ²-amyrin was isolated for the first time fromLaurencia microcladia, marine algaedistributed widely in Egypt found to have antibacterial activity against Staphylococcus aureus, Bacillus subtilis, Salmonella typhi, Escherichia coli, and Pseudomonas aeurginosa [10]. Table 3a: Minimum Inhibition Concentration (MIC) Test Organisms 3.12 µg/ml 6.2 µg/ml 12.5 µg/ml 25 µg/ml 50 µg/ml Concentration Staphylococus Aureus o* + Streptococus Pyogenes o* + + Streptococcus Feacalis o* + Escherichia Coli o* + Klebsiella Pneumonia o* + Salmonella Typhi o* + Shigella Dysenteria o* + Candida Krusei o* + + Candida Stellatoidea o* + + Microsporum Sp o* + + Trichophyton Rubrum o* + + KEY: = No turbidity (No growth), o* = MIC, + = Turbid (Growth) Table 3b: Minimum Bactericidal Concentration and Minimum Fungicidal Concentration (MBC/MFC) Test Organisms 3.12 µg/ml 6.2 µg/ml 12.5 µg/ml 25 µg/ml 50 µg/ml Concentration Staphylococus aureus o* + + + Streptococus pyogenes o* + + + Streptococcus feacalis o* + + + Escherichia coli o* + + + Klebsiella pneumonia o* + + Salmonella typhi o* + + + Shigella dysenteria o* + + + Candida krusei o* + + + Candida stellatoidea o* + + + + Microsporum sp o* + + + + Trichophyton rubrum o* + + + KEY: = No turbidity (No growth), o* = MBC/MFC + = Turbid (Growth) Spectra results The structure of compound EN1 was elucidated using Nuclear Magnetic Resonance Spectroscopy (NMR), 1-DNMR and 2-DNMR and also by comparing the obtained data with already existing literature. The results obtained are as shown in the table. H1NMR: 7.2401, 5.2346, 3.2100, 3.2021, 3.1911, 3.1836, 2.3241, 2.1768, 2.1585, 2.0742, 2.0181, 2.0023, 1.9942, 1.9793, 1.9727, 1.9067, 1.9012, 1.8923, 1.8865, 1.8621, 1.8455,1.8379, 1.8227, 1.7276, 1.7067, 1.6857, 1.6669, 1.6529, 1.6353, 1.6302, 1.6127, 1.5952, 1.5890, 1.5669,1.5463, 1.5230,1.4987,1.4836,1.4667,1.4579,1.4402,1.4276,1.3730,1.3429, 1.3195, 1.2990, 1.2780, 1.2630, 1.2329,1.1813,1.1514,1.1169,1.0870, 1.0639,1.0316, 1.0195,0.9989, 0.9759, 0.9681, 0.9404, 0.9322, 0.9217, 0.9088, 0.8927, 0.8841, 0.8680, 0.8591,0.8450 0.8341 13CNMR: 137.9624, 125.9002, 79.0731, 77.2169, 77.0054, 76.7938, 55.2568, 52.7408, 47.9239, 47.5759, 42.0388, 39.5194, 39.0811, 38.8495, 38.7715, 38.6441, 37.0200, 36.7105, 33.0001, 30.6267, 29.6969, 29.3557, 28.1492, 28.0359, 27.2530, 24.2027, 23.5770, 23.3098, 21.1608, 18.3150,17.0954, 16.9846, 15.5986, 15.4777. The 13C NMR spectrum (Figure 3) showed thirty (30) major recognizable carbon signals, eight methyl groups at ÃŽ ´37.0200 (C-22), 28.0359 (C-23), 15.5986 (C-24), 15.4777 (C-25), 16.9846 (C-26), 24.2027 (C-27), 17.0954 (C-28), 28.1492 (C-29), 23.3098 (C-30) and a secondary hydroxyl bearing carbon 79.0731 at (C-3). It also showed some recognizable signals at ÃŽ ´ 125.9002 and 137.9624 ppm which is assignable to the double bond at C-12 and C-13. In addition, ten methylene groups, eight methyl groups , six quaternary carbons atoms from DEPT experiment were observed. The chemical shift at ÃŽ ´137.962, 125.9002 which are C-12 and C-13 and the consistent flow of methyl groups from C-23 to C-30 were characteristic peaks for a ÃŽ ²- Amyrin type of skeleton [11] and [12]. 1HNMR, 13C NMR and DEPTH spectra of the proposed compound ÃŽ ²-amyrin Figure1: 1HNMR Figure 2 : 13C NMR Figure 3: DEPT Table 4: Comparison of 13C NMR spectrum data of ÃŽ ²-amyrin Obtained from the Aerial parts of M. barteri with literature Carbon Position ÃŽ ´13CNM ÃŽ ´ppm ÃŽ ²-amyrin, Experimental ÃŽ ´13CNMR ÃŽ ´ppm ÃŽ ²-amyrin, Literature [12] ÃŽ ´13CNMR ÃŽ ´ppm ÃŽ ²-amyrin, Literature [11] 1 38.8495 38.7 37.3 2 27.2530 27.2 28.28 3 79.0731 79.3 71.85 4 38.7715 38.5 37.30 5 55.2568 55.1 36.81 6 18.3150 18.6 21.12 7 38.6441 32.4 42.35 8 39.5194 39.8 45.90 9 47.9239 47.6 50.18 10 36.7105 36.9 36.55 11 23.5770 23.6 24.33 12 125.9002 121.7 121.70 13 137.9624 145.2 140.81 14 42.0388 41.7 44.36 15 29.3557 26.2 26.13 16 21.1608 26.1 23.11 17 29.6969 32.6 48.48 18 47.5759 47.2 45.89 19 39.0811 46.8 39.82 20 30.6267 31.0 36.49 21 33.0001 34.7 34.00 22 37.0200 37.1 31.71 23 28.0359 28.0 29.3 24 15.5986 15.4 19.84 25 15.4777 15.4 19.10 26 16.9846 16.8 18.90 27 24.2027 25. 9 18.30 28 17.0954 28.4 19.20 29 28.1492 33.8 36.18 30 23.3098 23.7 19.42 Proposed structure EN1-(C30H50O, 426.7 g/mol) Name: ÃŽ ²-Amyrin or ÃŽ ²-Amyrenol Conclusion The isolation of ÃŽ ²-Amyrin from the aerial plant parts of M. barteri, whose bioactivity was established from this work by its zone of inhibition, is comparable to the drugs of Ciprofloxacin, Fluconazole and Fulcin. This justifies why the plant really serves as a general purpose antibiotic in traditional medicine in our society. The preliminary phytochemical screening also shows that the ethylacetate extract contains other classes of compounds that can be further isolated and tested for microbial activities and this can lead to chains of discoveries as the quest of precursors for modern drugs are continually on course.

Sunday, October 13, 2019

Wedding Speech by the Bride :: Wedding Toasts Roasts Speeches

Wedding Speech by the Bride It is not traditional for the bride to speak but I thought it only right that I start married life by having the last word and I would like to take this opportunity to thank several people. Firstly, thank you for biting the bullet, proposing, and turning up today, on time and appropriately dressed. You are the love of my life, my best friend, and now my husband. I don't think anybody could be happier than I am today, and I can't wait for us to share the rest of our lives together. It means a lot to be your wife, after five years of being your girlfriend, and I’m sure he's happy now that he can start to let himself go. To my in-laws, thank you for making me feel so welcome in your family. Thank you for raising him so well, although I understand that the warranty is out of date now and the refund deadline has long since passed. I might keep him for a while though as he has so many qualities: charm, brains, and beauty are sadly the only ones missing. To dad and mom, thank you for your love, support and care over the last twenty-eight years and also for the generous financial contribution toward this wedding that helped us push the boat out a little further. I feel privileged to be sharing our day with most of the friends and family who have been so important to us. Many of you have traveled from afar: Australia, Azerbaijan, Nigeria, Singapore, Germany, the UK, and some of you have had to take time off work to be here. Thanks to all of you for the efforts and sacrifices you have made to be with us today.

Saturday, October 12, 2019

Berlin Wall Piece :: Sam Shepard

A Piece of History A seventh grader asks his dad about the eighties. Unfortunately his dad can't remember anything about the eighties;and the older sister helps him remember the past. â€Å"Berlin Wall Piece,† by Sam Shepard is a story where a small piece of concrete helps a crazy father remember his modern history. A theme for the story would be: how a small piece of history can bring back so many old memories and controversies. When the story first opens up, a seventh grader is interviewing his father for his social studies class. The father is being questioned by his own son or daughter. The story does not reveal the sex of the youngest child. The father is unaware of the past; he can't remember absolutely nothing. The youngest child is confused, and cannot understand why his father can't help him. The father explains to the child that there was nothing important going in the eighties. The most important and significant thing for his father was the birth of his two children and his wife. The rest of it was lies, trash, and insignificant things the world had offered him. The truth was that nothing more matter to him than his children and wife. He had everything in the world he could ever wish for. The young child could not understand his fathers intentions to his answers. It was all a big mystery. During the story his father tries to remember the moments he lived in the eighties; but nothing came to mind. It was like if he was never born. He knew nothing, everything was erased from his mind. Thankfully the oldest child knew much more than the father did. She could remember everything, she had an incredible memory. She helped out her younger sibling by telling her stories of the eighties. She knew a lot. She was a very smart girl who was just a year or so older than the younger child. She also knew political stuff that happened during the eighties. Like when she got a piece of the Berlin Wall that was destroyed back in the eighties. The younger child did not believe this was true. On the other hand the father was unaware of this. He was confused, he couldn't remember when his own child had visited the Berlin Wall. The older sister was amazed by his father's poor memory. She brought down a piece of the Berlin Wall from her bedroom.

Friday, October 11, 2019

The Twilight Saga 5: Midnight Sun 27. Deadlock

Warm, sweeping, glorious, relief, the most powerful emotion that had hit me in days, more forceful than my anger, my agony†¦my pain, rushed over me. This emotion was so full of an alleviation and ease that all of the anguish and distress was leaving my body as I saw the emotions in Bella's eyes again. At the sight, I realized that I never truly appreciated her beauty. My eyes looked up as I silently prayed to whatever entity that kept her alive, letting them know how devoutly thankful I truly am. Looking back at her, the deep depths, the windows to her soul, continued to move in quick irregular motions as she reached up to pull the oxygen tube from her nose. â€Å"No, you don't.† I reached over to stop her hand. My chin was resting only inches from her face when her eyes finally met mine. She was disorientated. â€Å"Edward?† Her voice was hoarse, drained, like she was fatally wounded. A tiny pucker formed between her brows. She tried to focus on my face. â€Å"Oh, Edward, I'm so sorry!† She was sorry? What did she need to be sorry for? â€Å"Shhhh.† I attempted to stop her insanity. â€Å"Everything's all right now.† I tried to speak bracing words of comfort. She needn't be so anxious with her frail body being in such a broken state. â€Å"What happened?† Her words were slurred slightly, almost like she was drunk. Memories of the events that happened that fateful morning, which brought her to this place, rushed across my mind. My stomach bubbled with a sickening acid. â€Å"I was almost too late. I could have been too late,† I whispered, torment lacing each syllable. â€Å"I was so stupid, Edward. I thought he had my mom.† Of course, she would try to put the blame on herself. â€Å"He tricked us all,† I said, trying to ease her mind. She really should be resting. â€Å"I need to call Charlie and my mom,† worry was present in her eyes†¦always worried about someone else, anyone else, but herself. â€Å"Alice called them. Rene is here — well, here in the hospital. She's getting something to eat right now.† â€Å"She's here?† She tried to sit up, her body swaying slightly. I couldn't let her hurt herself anymore so I lightly pushed her back down onto the pillows. â€Å"She'll be back soon,† I promised. â€Å"And you need to stay still.† â€Å"But what did you tell her?† Her voice was panicked. â€Å"Why did you tell her I'm here?† Even in her drugged stupor, she was still trying to protect our secret. Without effort, my love radiated out of me along with the agony that rippled through me at the thought of what actually happened just those two days ago. â€Å"You fell down two flights of stairs and through a window.† You were tortured by a vicious vampire and I was nearly too late. â€Å"You have to admit, it could happen.† I tried to lighten the mood with this small joke. She sighed at my bad humor and I could see her wince slightly at the pain it caused. Her eyes finally left mine to roam over her broken and mangled body. â€Å"How bad am I?† She asked, curious. This time I sighed. The damage was extensive. â€Å"You have a broken leg, four broken ribs, some cracks in your skull, bruises covering every inch of your skin, and you've lost a lot of blood. They gave you a few transfusions. I didn't like it — it made you smell all wrong for a while.† I took in a deep breath at the luxurious scent that now filled the small room, letting it sting my throat with the pleasurable burning sensation. â€Å"That must have been a nice change for you,† she half smiled. She had it all wrong though. To imagine her without the palatable scent was almost unbearable, like I had drank all the goodness from her body and it was being replaced by some cheap imitation. â€Å"No, I like how you smell.† â€Å"How did you do it?† Her voice was strained. I knew what she was asking. Many memories stirred from that horrible morning. Blood was coming out of her in torrents, flooding the floor. The blood†¦how did I stop? I remembered the pleasure and the pain that consumed my body at just the mere thought of her warm blood in my mouth, my burning throat with the accompanied obsessive longing finally being quenched. The thought tore at every nerve in my body. The disgust I felt didn't stop me though; I still brought her wrist to my mouth and drank from her. Even when she yanked around in my grasp, thrusting against my hold, screaming, I didn't let go. I didn't even know how I did it. â€Å"I'm not sure,† there was the tiniest quiver in my voice. Gently, I lifted her hand which was wrapped in white gauze, examining it carefully. Along with the ache that seared deep inside me, there was this new indication of what I was. A monster. A creature that should have no part in this angel's life. Lightly caressing her hand I shivered at this sick souvenir that would always be on her wrist which made my dead heart shatter. The wires that connected her to all the monitors were just another vivid reminder on top of everything else at how fragile and breakable she was. Each passing second felt like borrowed time. I sighed. â€Å"It was impossible†¦ to stop,† my voice was low, a whisper. But I did stop; I was able to keep her alive. â€Å"Impossible. But I did.† My eyes met hers, a smile creeping up my face; a great rush of affection washing over me. â€Å"I must love you.† â€Å"Don't I taste as good as I smell?† She returned my smile. The satisfaction†¦the gratifyingly warm blood in my mouth ?C it was beyond delicious. It coursed through my body, sweeter than life. â€Å"Even better — better than I'd imagined.† â€Å"I'm sorry,† she apologized. She was†¦sorry? Again, what was with the apologies? If it wasn't for my stupidity in the first place she wouldn't have even been in the situation to have her blood sucked by me, of all creatures. I looked up to the ceiling in exasperation before returning my gaze to her. â€Å"Of all the things to apologize for.† â€Å"What should I apologize for?† For a moment I was lost in desperate speculation, thoughts consuming my mind momentarily. Only one thing came to mind. â€Å"For very nearly taking yourself away from me forever.† If her life had ended that day†¦I shuddered†¦I too, would have died. â€Å"I'm sorry,† she apologized again. â€Å"I know why you did it. It was still irrational, of course. You should have waited for me, you should have told me.† At this, I realized maybe she didn't trust me as much as I thought. She shouldn't trust me. Because of me, she was here in this hospital bed, for several days, fighting to regain consciousness. â€Å"You wouldn't have let me go,† she explained, like I should have known this. â€Å"No,† I replied in a stern tone. â€Å"I wouldn't.† She shuddered and then slightly winced. My eyes roamed over her to find the culprit of her obvious pain, my nerves being pulled tighter at her discomfort. â€Å"Bella, what's wrong?† I pleaded She ignored me, wanting more answers. â€Å"What happened to James?† James, I growled internally; the enemy being brought to the forefront of my mind. â€Å"After I pulled him off you, Emmett and Jasper took care of him,† I said with clenched teeth. Bella needed me, I knew that, but regardless, jealousy still rippled through me at the thought that it wasn't me who got to pull him apart – it wasn't me who burned him. Her eyebrow furrowed. â€Å"I didn't see Emmett and Jasper there.† â€Å"They had to leave the room†¦ there was a lot of blood.† Everyone's actions that night caught me off guard; all of them behaving like there was not a single drop of blood spilled in the building. Luckily, we all have no need for oxygen. â€Å"But you stayed,† she stated with a deep fervor, her face smoothing. â€Å"Yes, I stayed.† Obviously, I stayed. She needed me†¦she would have died. Preventing that was most important. â€Å"And Alice, and Carlisle †¦Ã¢â‚¬  she said in conjecture. Of course they stayed, too. They consider her part of our family. â€Å"They love you, too, you know.† â€Å"Did Alice see the tape?† She asked anxiously. â€Å"Yes,† I gritted my teeth. I remembered watching the tape through Alice's mind, the things he did to Bella ?C the way he taunted me on the video. â€Å"She was always in the dark, that's why she didn't remember,† Bella explained, distracting me. I nodded. â€Å"I know. She understands now,† I said darkly. That was all James did; hurt people and their families, only leaving reminders of his presence. Bella's hand came up to reach for my face, but the IV stopped her from moving far. â€Å"Ugh.† She winced. My head came up from her pillow, concerned. â€Å"What is it?† I asked anxiously, the image of James still in my view ?C anger still coursing through me. â€Å"Needles,† she explained, looking up like she was going to be sick. She took several deep breaths. Instantly, the anger left my body as humor replaced it. The absurdity of it all ?C she was beaten by a vampire, yet this†¦needle, of all things, makes her sick. â€Å"Afraid of a needle,† I muttered under my breath, shaking my head. â€Å"Oh, a sadistic vampire, intent on torturing her to death, sure, no problem, she runs off to meet him. An IV, on the other hand†¦Ã¢â‚¬  She rolled her eyes. â€Å"Why are you here?† She asked. Instantly, I felt a chill in my stomach. I just stared at her, surveying her face, confusion sweeping over me. Then, it hit me. Maybe she didn't want me here, which is understandable, but it still made my heart ache, my body shriveled in pain. My eyebrows pulled together as a frown replaced my previous amusement. â€Å"Do you want me to leave?† An obvious grimace appearing on my face. â€Å"No!† She protested as loudly as she could. â€Å"No, I meant, why does my mother think you're here? I need to have my story straight before she gets back.† â€Å"Oh,† I breathed, once again, relief burst through me; understanding replacing confusion. She still wants me here! Happiness swelled inside me like a balloon. â€Å"I came to Phoenix to talk some sense into you, to convince you to come back to Forks.† I fixed my face, like I was trying to convince her myself, proving this lie was convincing. â€Å"You agreed to see me, and you drove out to the hotel where I was staying with Carlisle and Alice — of course I was here with parental supervision,† I infused innocently, â€Å"but you tripped on the stairs on the way to my room and†¦ well, you know the rest. You don't need to remember any details, though; you have a good excuse to be a little muddled about the finer points.† Looking into her eyes I could see her mental processes whirling around before she spoke. â€Å"There are a few flaws with that story. Like no broken windows,† she said matter-of-factly. â€Å"Not really,† I chuckled lightly under my breath. â€Å"Alice had a little bit too much fun fabricating evidence. It's all been taken care of very convincingly — you could probably sue the hotel if you wanted to. You have nothing to worry about,† I assured her, caressing her cheek with the lightest of touches, letting her warmth envelope me. â€Å"Your only job now is to heal,† I ordered. I continued to trace my fingers around her magnificent face. Her heart began to jump around wildly, the monitor echoing the erratic palpitations. â€Å"That's going to be embarrassing,† she muttered. This could be more amusing than I realized. Now her heart was beating loudly enough for both of us to hear with all of this equipment magnifying it. I chuckled. â€Å"Hmm, I wonder†¦Ã¢â‚¬  I leaned in, deliberately trying to hear her reaction; the beeping noise hammered quickly along with her heart before my cold lips even reached her warm ones. Her heart continued to beat a little faster as I slowly moved in for the kiss. Gently, I reminded myself; placing my lips upon hers, sending a spine tingling sensation through me as she lightly moaned in pleasure. Her heart was racing before it gave a huge bound and then it stopped altogether. Panic hit. I pulled back instantly as the light beeping noise started again. Relief, a feeling that seemed to be recurring over and over today, swept over me. â€Å"It seems that I'm going to have to be even more careful with you than usual,† I grimaced. â€Å"I was not finished kissing you,† she grumbled. â€Å"Don't make me come over there.† Affection gushed up inside me and against my careful stature; a smile crept up my face at her obvious love for me. It was amazing that she still yearned to be with me like I craved to be with her. After everything I had done to her she still wished for a proximity that I was still reluctant to give her; I was filled with a trepidation that I would hurt her, break her, kill her somehow. Despite my thoughts, I still bent down to press my lips lightly to hers. The heat crept up my face and down my veins as it brought warmth to my cold heart. In the hallway, I could hear a discussion being whispered. â€Å"How long will it take before she wakes up?† Rene asked the nurse. Soon, please tell me soon! â€Å"It's up to her, Mrs. Dwyer.† â€Å"Well, thanks anyways,† she sounded defeated. Edward is still in there I bet ?C they have had enough time alone. Who knows what those crazy kids were up to before this accident happened. I pulled out of our kiss. â€Å"I think I hear your mother,† I smiled. â€Å"Don't leave me,† she cried irrationally. Terror was obvious in her deep brown eyes. â€Å"I won't,† I promised solemnly, and then I smiled serenely. â€Å"I'll take a nap.† I jumped from the stiff plastic chair by her side to the turquoise artificial-leather recliner at the foot of her bed, leaning it all the way back, and closing my eyes. I became a statue. â€Å"Don't forget to breathe,† she whispered mockingly. Going along with her humor I took a deep breath, my eyes remained closed. Rene's light echoing footsteps moved towards the door before she lightly pressed against it, causing the door to crack open. She's awake! Rene thought excitedly. Her eyes peeked through the space, hoping to sneak a peek at a possible conversation, eavesdropping before she opened the door all the way to rush towards Bella's open eyes. â€Å"Mom!† Bella croaked out, her voice relieved. Oh, my baby girl, Rene's mind was easing slightly. Through her eyes I could see my still form feigning sleep. Ah, he's asleep†¦but still here. Her annoyed thoughts became verbal. â€Å"He never leaves, does he?† she muttered. â€Å"Mom, I'm so glad to see you!† Bella ignored her mom's spoken thought. Rene's expression cleared, her eyes returning to her daughter. Forget Edward†¦my baby. My beautiful baby girl. She's awake. Tears flowed down Rene's cheeks as she bent down to hug Bella awkwardly. â€Å"Bella, I was so upset!† Rene spluttered through her tears and other inarticulate sounds. I should have never, ever let her go to Forks. What was I thinking? I'm such a fool. â€Å"I'm sorry, Mom. But everything's fine now, it's okay,† Bella tried to reassure her. She's sorry? I'm sorry! Everything's not okay. Look at her†¦all the bruises. At Rene's thoughts, my stomach tightened sickeningly with pain. I felt a pang of unease. The bruises†¦the broken bones†¦they were my fault, no one else's. Sick images swam in my head and continued to come at me relentlessly. Every part of me ached with my idiocy ?C my ignorance ?C at what my clandestine existence ultimately brought to Bella. Thoughts of leaving her echoed through my head, but my love continued to pulse in my heart, my inability to leave her growing stronger. The ongoing battle continued to ensue inside me. â€Å"I'm just glad to finally see your eyes open.† Rene sat down at the end of Bella's bed. Her eyes are so sparkly. To think that there was a possibility that they could never open again†¦she grew sick at the thought, letting it trail off to images of coffins and people dressed in black. Struggling, I tried to push her images from my mind fiercely. My lurking doubts started resurfacing in my mind. I should leave Bella to her life, stop destroying her future. â€Å"How long have they been closed?† Bella gasped, her mouth forming a little O of horror. â€Å"It's Friday, hon, you've been out for a while.† â€Å"Friday?† Her voice was full of stunned disbelief. The two worst days of my life. I had to agree with Rene's thoughts, except they were the worst two days of my entire existence. â€Å"They had to keep you sedated for a while, honey — you've got a lot of injuries.† â€Å"I know,† Bella winced. â€Å"You're lucky Dr. Cullen was there. He's such a nice man†¦ very young, though. And he looks more like a model than a doctor†¦Ã¢â‚¬  If I wasn't married†¦ â€Å"You met Carlisle?† Bella interrupted her fantasy. â€Å"And Edward's sister Alice. She's a lovely girl.† The whole family is breath taking. What kind of food are they feeing them? Only if she knew of the consequences of having our beauty and the blood we drink to continue our deplorable existence. â€Å"She is,† Bella agreed sincerely, unstinting devotion, love emitting from Bella's eyes in rays of emotion. Suddenly I was in Rene's vision. Wow, she really does feel strongly for this family. But, what about this boy? He seems to be around much more than the rest. â€Å"You didn't tell me you had such good friends in Forks,† Rene said suspiciously, turning back to Bella but continuing to steal glances of me over her shoulder. I wonder what their deal is†¦ Rene was busy stealing another glance over her shoulder when Bella moaned in pain. The lamentation of grief reached Rene's ears, her eyes quickly found Bella's. So did mine, flashing open as soon as her mom's attention was no longer on me, panic coursing through me. â€Å"What hurts?† she demanded anxiously, voicing my same concerns. Her thoughts were full of a deep motherly concern, one full of love. â€Å"It's fine,† she tried to relieve our tension. â€Å"I just have to remember not to move.† Her words eased some of my panic. Closing my eyes again, I focused on her through Rene's thoughts. Never again. She's not going back to Forks. Thank god for Phil's contract. She'll be so excited. â€Å"Where's Phil?† Bella blurted out, almost as if she were reading her mother's mind too. â€Å"Florida– oh, Bella! You'll never guess! Just when we were about to leave, the best news!† â€Å"Phil got signed?† Bella interjected. â€Å"Yes! How did you guess! The Suns, can you believe it?† She can finally move back home! Deep down I could feel the hollowing of my insides along with the burning of my heart at the thought of Bella moving away, but it was the best thing she could do. She should leave, graduate high school, college†¦get married and have kids. Not stay with a vampire who could offer her no future. â€Å"That's great, Mom,† she replied in a questioning enthusiasm. I knew what was going to come next. The borrowed time was lessening. Instantly, I became increasingly nervous. â€Å"And you'll like Jacksonville so much,† she jabbered while Bella stared at her vacantly. â€Å"I was a little bit worried when Phil started talking about Akron, what with the snow and everything, because you know how I hate the cold, but now Jacksonville! It's always sunny, and the humidity really isn't that bad. We found the cutest house, yellow, with white trim, and a porch just like in an old movie, and this huge oak tree, and it's just a few minutes from the ocean, and you'll have your own bathroom –â€Å" â€Å"Wait, Mom!† Bella interrupted. â€Å"What are you talking about? I'm not going to Florida. I live in Forks.† My heart, my cold, dead, unbeating heart†¦I swear, it just started beating again. She wanted to stay in a place she hated, and I knew it was because of me. What? Maybe she doesn't understand. Rene smiled. â€Å"But you don't have to anymore, silly,† she laughed. â€Å"Phil will be able to be around so much more now†¦ we've talked about it a lot, and what I'm going to do is trade off on the away games, half the time with you, half the time with him.† â€Å"Mom.† Bella hesitated for a second. Automatically I tried to hear her mind, the space between us silent as ever before she spoke. â€Å"I want to live in Forks. I'm already settled in at school, and I have a couple of girlfriends† — suddenly I was in Rene's vision. It's because of him, I know it. — â€Å"and Charlie needs me. He's just all alone up there, and he can't cook at all.† I wasn't sure why, but it was clear that she didn't want to go to Florida with Rene, and I was all for that plan. Even though it wasn't a good plan. Forks†¦Rene's thoughts were babbling inarticulately. â€Å"You want to stay in Forks?† She spluttered. Again, I was in her vision, my face tense with the conversation. This boy†¦Does she love him, too? Still†¦Forks. Insane. â€Å"Why?† â€Å"I told you — school, Charlie — † she shrugged â€Å"ouch!† Bella ?C how do I comfort her? Her hand fluttered uselessly over Bella's body. Her eyes narrowed in on an un-bandaged spot and patted lightly. Seriously, though ?C school? Charlie? I don't believe it. â€Å"Bella, honey, you hate Forks,† she stated firmly. â€Å"It's not so bad.† Well, that wasn't the response I was hoping for. Oh, come on. Rene scoffed. Again, I saw my face flash in front of her eyes before she turned back to Bella. â€Å"Is it this boy?† she whispered. Bella opened her mouth and then closed it. What was she thinking? â€Å"He's part of it,† Bella finally spoke nonchalantly. â€Å"So, have you had a chance to talk with Edward?† â€Å"Yes.† He's quite mysterious†¦ â€Å"And I want to talk to you about that.† How stupid to even consider someone approving of me for their daughter. â€Å"What about?† Her lips pressed together tightly. â€Å"I think that boy is in love with you,† Rene alleged, keeping her voice low. â€Å"I think so, too.† Despite the situation we were under, I grinned at the memory of our time in the meadow, the first time I confessed my love for her. â€Å"And how do you feel about him?† She was pushing for details, which means Bella will have to lie. I cringed internally at that thought. She was a horrible liar. A small gush of air swept in and out of Bella's lungs before she spoke. â€Å"I'm pretty crazy about him.† This made me happy. I nearly took her life, yet, she was still ‘crazy about' me. â€Å"Well, he seems very nice, and, my goodness, he's incredibly good-looking, but you're so young, Bella†¦Ã¢â‚¬  I was hoping that I wouldn't have to have ‘the talk' with her until she was older. She sighed. What was I expecting? She is seventeen after all. â€Å"I know that, Mom. Don't worry about it. It's just a crush.† Crush? Just a crush? Her words burned more than my thirst. Deep down I knew she was perpetrating a farce, but still, just like at her house before we left for Phoenix, the words caught me off guard. Crush†¦I can handle that. Then it's not too serious after all. â€Å"That's right,† she agreed. Then she sighed and glanced guiltily over her shoulder at the big, round clock on the wall above my head. I need to get home†¦Phil. He'll be worried if I don't answer the phone. Seeing the time for myself I was disheartened that my time with her was slowly passing by. Sooner than I'd like, I would have to leave her forever. Was I brave enough? Did I have enough will power†¦enough strength? â€Å"Do you need to go?† Bella interrupted my reverie. â€Å"Phil's supposed to call in a little while†¦ I didn't know you were going to wake up†¦Ã¢â‚¬  â€Å"No problem, Mom.† Bella said indifferently. â€Å"I won't be alone.† That's right. I'll be here. She was just so soft and vulnerable. It seemed foolhardy to let her out of my sight, where anything could happen to her. And yet, the worst things that could happen to her would result from being with me. Deep down, I wished that she wasn't better off being away from me. I bet you won't†¦not with Edward keeping an eye on you. â€Å"I'll be back soon. I've been sleeping here, you know.† â€Å"Oh, Mom, you don't have to do that! You can sleep at home — I'll never notice.† The words were slurred slightly, the drugged stupor still not completely worn off. â€Å"I was too nervous,† she admitted sheepishly. â€Å"There's been some crime in the neighborhood, and I don't like being there alone.† Her eyes darted to the newspaper next to the bed. â€Å"Crime?† Bella asked, thunderstruck. It was awful. The building was in ruins. Rene was picturing the remains of the ballet studio. â€Å"Someone broke into that dance studio around the corner from the house and burned it to the ground — there's nothing left at all! And they left a stolen car right out front. Do you remember when you used to dance there, honey?† â€Å"I remember,† her voice quivered slightly under – what I would expect to be ?C bad memories. She looks scared. Maybe I should stay here†¦ â€Å"I can stay, baby, if you need me.† â€Å"No, Mom, I'll be fine. Edward will be with me.† Edward, again. That could also be a good reason to stay. â€Å"I'll be back tonight.† I hope he heard that. She glanced at me again as she thought it. â€Å"I love you, Mom.† â€Å"I love you, too, Bella. Try to be more careful when you walk, honey, I don't want to lose you.† I never realized her clumsiness would come to this though. Seriously ?C a coma in the hospital. I remembered Carlisle looking over Bella's X-ray at the hospital after the van nearly crushed her to death. She had many healed fractures. Trying to suppress laughter, I could stop the grin that spread across my face. I wonder if that hot boy will be in the room. I heard the nurse's thoughts that checked on Bella yesterday. She came bustling in then to check all of the tubes and wires. Rene watched the nurse for a minute. I better get going. I don't want to miss Phil's phone call. He'll be elated to hear that she is awake finally. She kissed Bella's forehead, patted her gauze-wrapped hand, and left. The nurse was checking the paper readout on the heart monitor. Hum†¦I wonder if this is because of him. The nurse pictured my face. He makes my heart do funny things, too. Maybe she is just worried or nervous. I would be if I woke up from a coma, too. â€Å"Are you feeling anxious, honey? Your heart rate got a little high there.† After Rene left I opened my eyes, watching the nurse interact with Bella, pushing her thoughts from my mind. â€Å"I'm fine,† Bella assured the nurse. I'm sure you are. I'd be fine too if he was at my bed side. â€Å"I'll tell your RN that you're awake. She'll be in to see you in a minute.† The nurse turned on her heals and strode quickly out of the room. It took me less than a second to move to her side, so quickly that she didn't see me move from point A to point B. Instead of her being surprised, her tiny eyebrows rose in humor. â€Å"You stole a car?† Duh, I wanted to say. Instead I just smiled. â€Å"It was a good car, very fast,† I refused to apologize; she didn't seem to mind. It had to be fast, my only purpose was to get to her as quickly as I could†¦to save her life before James had the opportunity to take her away from me forever. I was too late, but just in time to barely reverse the effects of the venom that had rushed down her veins. â€Å"How was your nap?† She smirked. â€Å"Interesting.† My mind was wondering, remembering her plea to stay in Forks and her word crush. My eyes narrowed slightly and she noticed the change in my facial features. â€Å"What?† Honestly, I was happy with her response to stay in Forks, but disappointed all the same because now I had to find the courage to tell her to go, that she would be better off without me in her life. Was I brave enough? Was I that self sacrificing? By the look on her face she had already read too much into my face so I looked down. â€Å"I'm surprised. I thought Florida †¦ and your mother†¦well; I thought that's what you would want.† The many nights I watched her sleep, as her worries and thoughts were spoken freely, let me know how much she truly cared for her mother. Also, when she talked about Rene it was if a parent were talking about a child. Was she just tired of the responsibility of her mother? That was uncharacteristic of her, so probably not the culprit to her reasoning to stay in Forks. The word crush rang through my mind again and so I couldn't be the reason, either. When I finally looked up she was staring at me uncomprehendingly. â€Å"But you'd be stuck inside all day in Florida. You'd only be able to come out at night, just like a real vampire.† A real vampire? What am I, chopped liver? The humor quickly passed. It was time to convince her to go back home†¦to Florida. â€Å"I would stay in Forks, Bella. Or somewhere like it,† I explained.† Someplace where I couldn't hurt you anymore.† She stared at me with a blank expression, like she was having trouble processing my words. Was it the drugs? Maybe this conversation should wait until she was more aware and alert. I was just making excuses. Her lips turned down into an unfathomable expression as the monitor magnified her heart beats which were quickly increasing. The beeping nose and the pounding in her chest were reaching a dangerous point, going so fast I was nervous. Her breathing picked up along with her heart. Soon, she was gasping, hyperventilating. Her eyes began to water as her face contorted into a horrible grimace of pain. The soft lines of her face were suddenly sharp and defined. I didn't know what to do, what to say. That beeping doesn't sound good. I better go check it out. A different nurse came marching into the room. Maybe she had a remedy that I didn't. She looked over the monitors to see that her regular heart beat, and the insane palpitations that were pulsing wildly through her, were not the same. Wow, she looks like she is in a lot of pain. Jeesh, what a tortured face. . â€Å"Time for more pain meds, sweetheart?† she asked sweetly, tapping the IV feed. â€Å"No, no,† Bella choked out, the pain still clearly in her tone. â€Å"I don't need anything.† Of course, she didn't want to seem weak. â€Å"No need to be brave, honey. It's better if you don't get too stressed out; you need to rest.† The nurse waited, but she just shook her head. â€Å"Okay,† she sighed. â€Å"Hit the call button when you're ready.† This better not be his fault or I'm going to kick him out of the room so she can get some rest. The nurse's stare bore into me, like she was trying to burn a hole through my skull before she glanced at the machinery like she was warning me she could hear it. She left the room. I'll be listening. Ignoring the overly observant nurse I placed my hands on Bella's face to bring her attention back to our conversation. Her eyes were full of moisture, the look in them wild with unease and anxiety. Her heart was still bounding wildly ahead. â€Å"Shhh, Bella, calm down.† I tried to soothe her. â€Å"Don't leave me,† she begged me, her voice cracking with the pain. Her pupils dilated in terror as her lips trembled uncontrollably. When she begged like this, how could I deny her anything? All my plans, all my thoughts†¦every second of deciding to leave her crumbled into little pieces. â€Å"I won't,† I promised. â€Å"Now relax before I call the nurse back to sedate you.† Still, her heart continued to thunder along, not relaxing one bit to my words. Great, I was going to give her a heart attack. All my efforts to keep her alive and just the mere thought of my absence would send her over the edge. A second was all it took to change everything: the atmosphere in the room, my mission here, the reason I leaned toward the glorious soul in front of me†¦ What had been for one purpose before was now for another. To stay. To keep her alive. To prevent her heart from exploding with the pain that I was feeling too. â€Å"Bella.† I lightly brushed her face apprehensively. â€Å"I'm not going anywhere. I'll be right here as long as you need me,† I promised. â€Å"Do you swear you won't leave me?† She whispered a small splutter of terror. She was gasping for air as her heart continued to beat out of control, her pulse continuing to reach a danger point. Her reactions robbed me temporarily of breath. It was oddly disembodying trying to understand her fear, because it was me who couldn't live without her. It shouldn't be the other way around. Before the nurse decides to kick me out of the room I had to calm her down. I took her face between my hands. Her warmth crept up my body slowly as I brought my face only inches from hers before whispering to her, â€Å"I swear.† Her breath was filling the air between us. It was very appealing, but in this moment I was too worried about her heart and her breathing. Each second the rhythmic motion of her breath and her heart slowed. I refused to let go of her until she had calmed down. When the monitors had quieted I sighed in relief. â€Å"Better?† I asked, surveying her face. â€Å"Yes,† she answered, her voice sounded guarded. Under my breath I began muttering so low she wouldn't hear me. â€Å"Beautiful, insane, overly sensitive girl. What an overreaction.† I shook my head. â€Å"Why did you say that?† She whispered. At first, I didn't know if she actually heard what I had muttered. â€Å"Are you tired of having to save me all the time? Do you want me to go away?† Again, insane. With increasing desperation I tried to explain to her that I did want her, that it would literally kill me if she went away. â€Å"No, I don't want to be without you, Bella, of course not. Be rational,† I added sensibly. â€Å"And I have no problem with saving you, either — if it weren't for the fact that I was the one putting you in danger†¦ that I'm the reason that you're here.† â€Å"Yes, you are the reason,† she interjected with a frown. â€Å"The reason I'm here –alive.† I had less resolution than ever. â€Å"Barely.† I choked out. â€Å"Covered in gauze and plaster and hardly able to move.† I stared down at her like it would force her to mend. â€Å"I wasn't referring to my most recent near-death experience,† her voice was slightly irritated. Staring at her, I tried to read her eyes. Yes, I saved her in the past, but that had nothing to do with the present. She was still in this hospital bed because of me. The silence tautened and strained. She finally spoke. â€Å"I was thinking of the others — you can take your pick. If it weren't for you, I would be rotting away in the Forks cemetery.† Her voice was like an angry drunken titter from all the drugs in her system. The memories made me wince several times. The van, Port Angeles†¦my thoughts trailed off, not wanting to think of where she would be if I wasn't there to intercede on her behalf. Then I realized I had already made my decision. I wasn't going to let her leave. If she did I would follow her, even if she was unaware of it. No matter what, I would watch over her, keep her from harm, for as long as I could justify it. Luckily, I don't see how she would ever not need me to keep her safe. I suddenly found myself wishing that her clumsiness would never go away. I looked at her gauze covered wrist, my original thoughts surfacing. â€Å"That's not the worst part, though,† I continued, ignoring her previous words of comfort.†Not seeing you there on the floor†¦ crumpled and broken.† The words caught in my throat. â€Å"Not thinking I was too late. Not even hearing you scream in pain — all those unbearable memories that I'll carry with me for the rest of eternity. No, the very worst was feeling†¦ knowing that I couldn't stop. Believing that I was going to kill you myself,† my voice tailed away feebly as the memory of her blood in my mouth, swirling sweetly down my throat, surfaced. â€Å"But you didn't,† she pointed out. â€Å"I could have. So easily.† Her breath came a little quicker again. Panic was obvious in her eyes. Did she finally understand that she should fear me? â€Å"Promise me,† she whispered. â€Å"What?† â€Å"You know what.† She gave me an insolent stare. I was wrong; she didn't fear me, just the opposite. How can I promise to never leave when I know one day I will have to? Not now, though. I can't leave her now when she needs me. Still, I gazed uncertainly towards her, my eyes automatically tightening. A lurking doubt resurfaced in my mind. She's here because of me. This is my fault. If I stay ?C this might happen again. I couldn't have that. I could feel the warmth of her pulse in the air and on my skin. Trying to master myself I realized that my time with her was ticking away. Hearing her voice – an extraordinary tonic, I might add – after the two days of complete and utter silence, settled my thoughts. â€Å"I don't seem to be strong enough to stay away from you, so I suppose that you'll get your way†¦ whether it kills you or not,† my tone growing more forlorn with each word. â€Å"Good.† She stated firmly. â€Å"You told me how you stopped†¦ now I want to know why,† she demanded. â€Å"Why?† I repeated warily, I hadn't recovered from the shock of the question. â€Å"Why you did it. Why didn't you just let the venom spread? By now I would be just like you.† Her words fell oddly upon my ears and were an unpleasant surprise. Words I didn't expect to hear come out of her mouth. Where did she learn this? In that precise moment it hit me like a bolt of lightning. Alice. A scathing noise escaped my lips as I thought about this. She was a bit sneakier than I realized. But telling Bella about vampire transformations was crossing the line. I couldn't suppress a shiver of loathing. I could feel my nostrils flaring as my lips grew tighter together. I didn't respond, not knowing if Alice really told her, or if it was another one of those legends she read about and was merely guessing how the conversion worked. Bella broke the silence. â€Å"I'll be the first to admit that I have no experience with relationships, but it just seems logical†¦ a man and woman have to be somewhat equal†¦ as in, one of them can't always be swooping in and saving the other one. They have to save each other equally.† It seems her knowledge is not as extensive as I first thought. Of course, in movies and books vampires had to bite their victims to turn them. It was easy for her to deduct these things. Instead of getting angry, I folded my arms on the side of her bed and rested my chin on my arms. Still, I will have to have a†¦talk†¦with Alice. I thought about what Bella said though, about saving each other equally. She doesn't realize how much she has saved me, how she pulled me out of the deepest depression that even Jasper has ever seen. My whole family has fallen in love with Bella merely for what her presence has done for me. â€Å"You have saved me,† I said quietly, letting her in on my revelation. â€Å"I can't always be Lois Lane,† she insisted, ignoring me. â€Å"I want to be Superman, too.† Her statements still had me utterly bewildered. She wanted to be a vampire. Of all things in the world that she could ask for, she asks for the one thing I refuse to give. I was unsure of the best way to approach the subject. Bella, I might kill you in the process and you will burn for three days and beg for death before you finally turn into a vampire who never sleeps and is always aching to quench ones thirst. No, that is too much information. â€Å"You don't know what you're asking.† I stared at the edge of her pillowcase, afraid she might see my thoughts displayed across my face. â€Å"I think I do.† â€Å"Bella, you don't know. I've had almost ninety years to think about this, and I'm still not sure,† I tried not to succumb to the rage I felt bubbling under my skin. Why was she pushing this subject? â€Å"Do you wish that Carlisle hadn't saved you?† â€Å"No, I don't wish that.† I used to, but now I realize my fate included Bella, and I would have never met her without Carlisle's rash decision to turn me. â€Å"But my life was over. I wasn't giving anything up.† â€Å"You are my life. You're the only thing it would hurt me to lose,† she admitted, not the least bit embarrassed. No matter how much she pleaded with me, I would never take her soul. It wasn't up for debate. â€Å"I can't do it, Bella. I won't do that to you.† â€Å"Why not?† She croaked. â€Å"Don't tell me it's too hard! After today, or I guess it was a few days ago†¦ anyway, after that, it should be nothing.† I glared at her. A positively dangerous look crept across my face. â€Å"And the pain?† I asked, curious. She flinched, obviously remembering the fire that burned through her veins. â€Å"That's my problem,† she said coolly. â€Å"I can handle it.† Insane. â€Å"It's possible to take bravery to the point where it becomes insanity.† â€Å"It's not an issue. Three days. Big deal.† Shock so huge it rooted me to the spot and roughly burst through me. Three days. This was something that could have only been told by another vampire. It wasn't Jasper, he respects other's wishes. Alice, on the other hand†¦the very nosy, annoying, short vampire that receives visions, has been pressing the ‘turn Bella into a vampire' campaign for a while now. I wonder what vision she is seeing now. It must be flickering, I haven't decided how I am going to get even with her for telling Bella about this. Venom was thundering through my veins. Enough was enough. I didn't want to flat out tell her no. I wanted her to want to be human. Maybe she needed reminders of why she should stay human. â€Å"Charlie?† I asked curtly. â€Å"Rene?† A blank silence greeted my words. She was opening and closing her mouth like words wouldn't form. I waited for her response, but obviously, she didn't have one. Did she finally reach her senses? â€Å"Look, that's not an issue either,† she finally muttered an obvious lie. Apparently she hasn't reached her senses. â€Å"Rene has always made the choices that work for her — she'd want me to do the same. And Charlie's resilient; he's used to being on his own. I can't take care of them forever. I have my own life to live.† Was she missing the key words here? If she were to stay human she would have a life to live. If she were a vampire, on the other hand, her life would just become this limitless existence that I refused to make her be a part of. â€Å"Exactly,† I snapped. â€Å"And I won't end it for you.† My careful composure was slipping. â€Å"If you're waiting for me to be on my deathbed, I've got news for you! I was just there!† Lame justification. â€Å"You're going to recover,† I reminded her. She took a deep breath at my words, returning my stare. There was no compromise in her face, and I wasn't budging either. â€Å"No,† Bella said slowly. â€Å"I'm not.† Anger vanished, fear replaced it. Was something else wrong with her†¦like cancer? Was she not telling me something? No, her life couldn't be like one of those sad stories you read about. My forehead automatically creased with worry. â€Å"Of course you are. You may have a scar or two†¦Ã¢â‚¬  â€Å"You're wrong,† she insisted. â€Å"I'm going to die.† No! She was not going to die, she was going to live. I would fight for her, keep her alive. A sense of hopelessness engulfed me. My mind was lost in a desperate speculation. Panic flared within me. â€Å"Really, Bella.† Anxiety broke through my voice. â€Å"You'll be out of here in a few days. Two weeks at most.† She glared at me like I was an idiot. â€Å"I may not die now†¦ but I'm going to die sometime. Every minute of the day, I get closer. And I'm going to get old.† Relief, glorious relief. I frowned at her as her words finally released the tension that built so suddenly. My fingers found my temples as I began to rub them, trying to soothe my troubled mind, closing my eyes. â€Å"That's how it's supposed to happen. How it should happen. How it would have happened if I didn't exist — and I shouldn't exist.† She snorted. I opened my eyes in surprise. â€Å"That's stupid. That's like going to someone who's just won the lottery, taking their money, and saying, ‘Look, let's just go back to how things should be. It's better that way.' And I'm not buying it.† She might have made a point if she used something besides the lottery as an example. â€Å"I'm hardly a lottery prize,† I growled, anger returning. â€Å"That's right. You're much better,† she pointed out. I rolled my eyes and my lips grew tight. It doesn't matter what else she says, she's wasting her breath. To take her soul would be the last thing on earth I would do. She will stay human. Even if Alice tries to take a bite I will tackle and kill if I must. â€Å"Bella, we're not having this discussion anymore. I refuse to damn you to an eternity of night and that's the end of it.† Now stop, I added internally. â€Å"If you think that's the end, then you don't know me very well,† she warned me. â€Å"You're not the only vampire I know.† I will stop her by any means. â€Å"Alice wouldn't dare,† I growled aloud. â€Å"Alice already saw it, didn't she?† She guessed. â€Å"That's why the things she says upset you. She knows I'm going to be like you†¦ someday.† Dammit! I slipped up. Bella is just too perceptive. I'm going to have to be doubly careful what I say around her, choosing my words more carefully. It's just so hard in a heated argument. â€Å"She's wrong,† I barked angrily. â€Å"She also saw you dead, but that didn't happen, either.† â€Å"You'll never catch me betting against Alice,† she retorted. We glared at each other for several long minutes. The regular intervals of the machines continued into our silence. Bella's heart was weirdly steady considering the heated discussion we just had. She was lying down but her chin till jutted out, her forehead was creased with thought and her lips pursed. My angry expression cleared at her beauty. It was heard to stay upset with such a glorious creature. â€Å"So where does that leave us?† She wondered. I chuckled darkly. â€Å"I believe it's called an impasse.† She sighed. â€Å"Ouch,† she muttered. â€Å"How are you feeling?† I asked. My eyes found the button for the nurse. I wanted to bring my original threat back into play if she didn't behave ?C sedation. â€Å"I'm fine,† she lied, her pain was breaking through the pretense. â€Å"I don't believe you,† I said gently. â€Å"I'm not going back to sleep,† she argued, refusing to let anyone think she was weak. â€Å"You need rest. All this arguing isn't good for you.† â€Å"So give in,† she suggested. â€Å"Nice try.† She wasn't behaving. Time for impulsive action. I reached for the button. â€Å"No!† Her eyes saw my hand reach out. I ignored her. â€Å"Yes?† the speaker on the wall squawked. â€Å"I think we're ready for more pain medication,† I said calmly, ignoring her furious expression. â€Å"I'll send in the nurse.† â€Å"I won't take it,† she said vehemently. Pills? Doubtful. I looked toward the sack of fluids hanging beside her bed. â€Å"I don't think they're going to ask you to swallow anything,† I smiled ruefully. The thundering of her heart jumped up into a faster face. Looking into her deep eyes I read the irrational fear. She needs rest, and medication will make the pain go away so she can do just that. It isn't like there are going to be sticking her with needles. I sighed in frustration. â€Å"Bella, you're in pain. You need to relax so you can heal. Why are you being so difficult? They're not going to put any more needles in you now.† â€Å"I'm not afraid of the needles,† she cried out. â€Å"I'm afraid to close my eyes.† It was hard to be frustrated at her when she said those words. Jubilation doused my previous anger. I smiled. She was just worried that I wouldn't be here. Hadn't I made it clear that I wasn't going anywhere? Her thoughts were completely irrational. I took her face in between my hands so she had to look at me. â€Å"I told you I'm not going anywhere. Don't be afraid. As long as it makes you happy, I'll be here.† She smiled back. â€Å"You're talking about forever, you know.† Then, I remembered her words to Rene. â€Å"Oh, you'll get over it — it's just a crush.† She shook her head in disbelief. â€Å"I was shocked when Rene swallowed that one. I know you know better.† One day she will outgrow me, though. My worst fear, yet I prayed she was right, that she would want me forever. â€Å"That's the beautiful thing about being human,† I whispered. â€Å"Things change.† Her eyes narrowed. â€Å"Don't hold your breath,† she retorted. I laughed. I could hold my breath forever if I had too, though I would never do it for something as stupid as wanting Bella to leave me. The nurse came into the room brandishing a syringe. Get out of my way. â€Å"Excuse me,† she said harshly to me. I got up and crossed to the end of the small room, leaning against the wall. I folded My arms and waited. Bella kept her eyes on me, still apprehensive. I met her gaze calmly. â€Å"Here you go, honey.† The nurse smiled as she injected the medicine into Bella's IV. â€Å"You'll feel better now.† â€Å"Thanks,† Bella mumbled, unenthusiastic. It didn't take long. Bella's head already began to lull from side to side. â€Å"That ought to do it,† the nurse muttered as Bella's eyelids drooped. The nurse promptly left the room, eyeing me suspiciously. Even though she was obviously losing consciousness I rushed over to Bella to place my hands on her face, to hold her head still. â€Å"Stay.† Bella slurred. â€Å"I will,† I promised. â€Å"Like I said, as long as it makes you happy†¦Ã¢â‚¬  I hesitated, not long enough for Bella to notice. â€Å"As long as it's what's best for you,† I added to my statement. â€Å"‘S not the same thing,† she mumbled more inarticulate words. Watching her trying to beat off the medication was kind of†¦hilarious. I laughed. â€Å"Don't worry about that now, Bella. You can argue with me when you wake up.† A cheesy grin spread across her face as her eyes became small slits. ‘†Kay.† I continued to try and suppress laughter. I was very glad Emmett wasn't here, the jokes would never end. Looking down at my now drunken beauty, I brought my lips to her ear. â€Å"I love you,† I whispered. â€Å"Me, too.† â€Å"I know,† I laughed quietly at my joke, remembering her saying that when I finally sucked the venom out of her wrist and told her I loved her. Again, I tried to suppress laughter as her head lulled sideways, her lips puckering at a funny angle, facing the opposite direction of my face. I shook my head and brought my lips to hers. â€Å"Thanks,† she sighed. â€Å"Anytime,† I chuckled. She went limp in the bed, but was still struggling to reach reality. â€Å"Ed..war?† she tried to say my name, but it came out all wrong. â€Å"Yes?† I smiled down at her â€Å"I'm betting on Alice,† she mumbled, her words clearer this time. My humor vanished, a frown replaced my smile. This argument was far from over, but no matter what, our deadlock would remain. I kissed her forehead and sat down next to her to hold her hand until she wakes again.